Aindra Prabu about himself

Braja-sundari Dasi - August 8, 2010 8:33 pm

Part 1


Dear Maharajas and Prabhus,

Please accept my humble obeisances. All glories to Srila Prabhupada. Jai Sri Sri Nitai-Gauranga. Param vijayate Sri Krsna sankirtan!

The temple management here has brought it to my attention that some of my godbrothers think there is a need to take a look at “Aindra prabhu’s activities, and more specifically, his philosophical outlook.”


In compliance with this demand, firstly, I would like to give a brief sketch of my activities. Basically, as Srila Prabhupada has stated that the whole spiritual world is within the four walls of the Krsna-Balarama mandir, in an effort to realize the truth of this statement, I mostly relegate my existence to the confines of the temple room, my living quarters, and unfortunately, the bathroom. I rarely ever even go to the guest house what to speak of the restourant and you will never find me loitering at Bihari Lal’s drinking coca-cola or any other such nonsense, nor wasting my valuable time with useless quasi-devotional socializing or institutional politics.


I always scrupulously avoid as far as possible any dealings with women in any way, shape or form although I don’t despise them. I am keenly aware of the simple truth that I’m not very advanced and that I don’t have much longer to live. So, I spend my time doing my level best to engage myself in continuously chanting the holy names of Krsna by performance of sankirtan yajna and hari nama japa with the hopes of at least elevating myself to the clearing stage of nama-bhajan. With the remaining time, I absorb my heart and soul in relishing Krisna-katha in the form of attendance in Srimad Bhagavatam class and discussing the philolophy of Krisna consciousness as I have understood it from my spiritual master by trying to view it from different angles of vision as per his merciful advice.


I also usually spend at least three housr daily hearing my favorite stories from Srila Prabhupada’s Krsna Book during the time of my personal deity worship. Although my vile tongue is undeserving, I do my best to honour the sacred remnants of the Lord’s mahaprasadam once a day before taking rest at night to avoid tiredness and the tendency to sleep during the daytime. I don’t like to admit it, but fallen as I am, I generally require a minimimm of 4 or 5 hours rest daily, prefeerably 6 if possible, because my voice has been so much damaged and broken down over the years from so much heavy Hare Krsna chanting, that I need complete rest to recuperate the strength of my batlered vocal mechanism. At least in Vrndavan Dhama, even sleeping gives one the benefit of offering full dandavats, so that makes me feel a little better about it.


My increasing awareness of impending death induces me to live each day as if it were my last. To be real, it’s difficult for me to find much time for replying to my mail or to communicate messages such as this because I don’t have secretary and being the rather old fashion, simple devotee that I am, I hardly know what a computer is, much less how to use one. So, I hope you will bear with me and try to appreciate that I value you, my godbrothers, and your good wishes enough to attempt to hash out a reasonable response to all points in question by hand. Hare Krsna!


As far as philosophical outlooks are concerned, I’m very pleased to understand I have godbrothers who actually have an interest in discussing philosophy. It’s rare to find anyone these days who really even knows the philosophy well enough to discuss it. So often I have to hear so many misconceived notions about the philosophy of Krsna consciousness or otherwise all varieties of trivial small talk. This one promises to be a refreshing discussion. Does anyone expect that I should condense what I have realized in 24 years of service to our Srila Pravbhupada into 2 or 3 lines so we can have a good look at Aindra’s philolophical outlook? Shakespeare said, “Brevity is the soul of wit.” Kaviraja Gosvami says, “Brevity is true eloquence.” But let me assure you; I’m neither so witty nor very eloquent. Neither, in certain respects, were Bhaktivinode, Bhaktisiddhanta, our Srila Prabhupada, nor any of our predecessor acharyas, for that matter, who all wrote volumes and volumes of literatures to clearly express their philosophical outlook. But anyway, let me try. Here goes...uh...Let’s see...yes. “God is great. We are small.” There you have it! I learned that when I was 4 years old from my Christian sunday school teacher. Almost 20 years later, I heard Prabhupada say the smae thing; so I figured I could accept it as a universal axiomatic truth. How’s that? Is that good enough? Need I say more? You probably weren’t very satisfied; so, I’ll keep going with the hopes that you won’t become too angry with me.


My understanding is that our philosophy is a philosophy of personalism. During the last 12 years of my residence in Vrndavan, I have observed during the Prabhupada disappearance festivals, whether it is due to lack of organization or a lack of interest on the part of many of our leading devotees for whatever personal reasons they may be having, that the procession around Vrndavan with Srila Prabhupada has been feebly attended. Generally, the procession starts off with a big bang; but half way through, for some reason, only a handful of devotees remain struggling to keep some kind of a kirtan together whilst most of the general devotees and other senior godbrothers either leave all together, lag miles behind or run miead apparently as if wishing to get the thing over with. There mayaa have been a little improvement this year but as yet still insufficient by the strech of anyone;s imagination.


Similarly, on Prabhupada’s disappearance day itself, I have observed that almost invariably, during the morning session, all the “big guns” naturally get their opportunity to glorify Prabhupada first and we certainly relish hearing about their experiences and realizations. Nevertheless, I question why it is that the senior disciples of Srila Prabhuapda generally don’t seem to place much importance on hearing the realizations of their juniors almost as if there are more important things to do than to stay up past their bed time one day a year to appreciate the heartfelt feelings of all their godbrothers and godsisters. Objectively speaking, I have to say that over the years, I have very often discovered that many times the “small timers” offer even deeper and more profound expressions than some of their seniors. This indicates to me that advancement in Krisna consciousness may not always be attributed to numbers of years but rather to the depths and degrees of actual heartfelt surrender to the will of guru and Krsna. I know we all have to attend our important preaching projects. Still, I, bu way of encouragement, humbly request all lof my senior godbrothers attending such festivals to kindly participate and contribute their invaluable input to the success of the complete Prabhupada disappearance programe for the mutual benefit of all concerned.



It obvious to ome that for whatever reasons, my concerned well wishers could not have possibly been there to hear what I actually said in Prabhupada’s room that evening. Even if any of them were present at that time (about midnight), as I was the last initiated disciple of Srila Prabhupada to get the opportunity to speak on that day, it must have been well past their normal bedtime. Either they were dozing between phrases or their intellect had become too much stupefied to grasp the real import of what I actually presented. Otherwise, how could such inane speculations have arisen from persons whom Srila Prabhupada has considered to be among the most intellegent men on this planet. May be Aindra thinks he is the incaarnation of Jesus Christ of Cnfusius or somebody. Who knows what Aindra thinks! He is a little eccentric after all. May be if you prabhus could have made it a point to have been there, then the confusion about what some people seem so confused about would be a little less confused.


Every devotee knows that speculation transgresses the regulative injunction agaainst gambling. Speculation or gambling beats at the last existing leg of religion in this age of Kali, namely truthfulness. I have faith that those of us who join this Krisna consciousness movement and sacrifice our lives to uphold the purity of this great sampradaya and its missionary activities are certainly amongst the most intellegent human beings on earth; but we should always be wary against misusing our intellegence by allowing ourselves to enter the realm of speculation. The account under scrutiny is so much filled with misunderstanding, sheer speculation, distortion and consequent miserly misrepresentation that, in truth, I can’t help but wonder to what extent the other 3 regulative principles are being strictly followed. Are you prabhus at least daily chanting your minimum 16 rounds? The picture would almost be comical if it wasn’t so laughably sad. Any way, it is not my intention to second guess the sincerity of anyone’s motives, but I am a person, you know.


I’m suprised and disappointed that after all these years we wouldn’t be having enough of a personal relationship that someone couldn’t just come and discussed these things with me man to man to alay your fears. Iif I’m off base, tag me; poke me in the nose; give me a jolt. And if you’re off base, expect me to do the same. That’s what godbrothers are for, to keep each other awake. But at least kindly stop all the nonsense speculation. Speculation and impersonalism go hand in hand. Impersonalism is unjust. Injustices can lead to alienation. Now is the time for sadhu sanga and increased understanding, genuine love and trust; not hollow misconception, perpetual misunderstanding and unnecessary estrangement.


Is our intrest in clearing the way for Krsna consciousness or in excercizing our sense of self-importance by muckraking and going about making issues out of things like self-righteous reformed prostitutes with hearts of questionable integrity? O.K., maybe we’re not self appointed vigilantes taking pot shots at all the ISKCON kali chelas. Maybe we genuinely feel the need to help insure the healthy growth of our ISKCON society and its individual members. Still, we would do well if as health and welfare officers, self-apppointed or otherwise, we would think to first get a proper diagnosis of whatever desease before valliantly administering the medicine.. Discretion is the better part of valour. At least check the man’s pulse. So-called doctors who administer medicine without first ascertaining the condition of the patient by feasible means, to rather cheat or even harm the patient, are quacks by any one’ standards. This is all the more true in consideration of spiritual health and welfare. The road to hell was paved with good intentions.


Our process of aquiring knowledge is by avaroha not by aroha. If we want to know what an author meant by what he has written in his book, rather than approaching others who may have even read (or misread) the book and formulated their own ideas and opinions, it is always more sensible, when possible, to hear directly from the author himself or from someone who the author accepts as his true representative. This is obviously the way to clear all misgivings, to communicate with person directly. That we now should have to communicate through the use of machines is not so encouraging though. Machines can have the tendency to take away the personal touch. Modern men are notorious for hiding behind their machine (E.g. the present day so-called ksatriyas who sit in their comfortable offices for pushing a botton to obliterate their enemies without having to see anyone’s facce. Of course Srila Prabhupada certainly used machines for his expanded preaching work; dictaphones, typewriters, computers, printing presses, cameras, amplifiers, he used everything.


We don’t deny the fact that Prabhupada has personally touched our lives through his books and tapes which are all produced with the aid of modern machinery. Still, how much more wonderful it was to personally meet and communicate face to face and eye to eye with the person behind all the machines. No one could deny the dynamic experience of the personal nature of the person. Once Srila Prabhupada was asked if it was alright if the pujari could play a kertan recording for the arotiks in the temple if there were no devotees around to perform kirtan. Prabhupada answaered, “Why don’t you get a machine to offer the arotik?!”; implying that the pujari himself, the person, should sing for his deity. This suggests that the deity would prefer to relate to a person than to a machine. The personal psychology is natural in each of us because it is originally there in Krsna. I invite all of you to reveal your mink in confidence and inquire confidentially with me, your godbrother, the person, Aindra Dasa.


That is the way of loving exchange between vaishnavas to my way of thinking. I’m not so difficult to find. I’m always happy to discuss any relevant level of Krsna katha with anyone who is (A) sincere, (:Party: not politically motivated and © without bigoted prejudicial bias or superstitious predisposition. Anyhow, I’m grateful for being given some forum for discussion. As I am by nature somewhat reclusive and perhaps seen as rather a bhajananandi by less thoughtful people on account of my relatively infrequent wanderings, I take it as Krsna’s arrangement for me to speak my heart, that we might get to better know each other as team mates fighting for the same goals of pure devotial service. So, if you will allow me at this point to humbly request everyone to kindly tighten your kaupins (if anyone still wears such things these days) because I need your full coolheaded attention to my here-to-fore explanation of things so as to avoid any further speculation, confusion or misunderstanding. If all this apears to be getting longer and longer, then I’m sorry and I beg your forgiveness, but that’s what you get for someone not personally talking with me earlier.


I have a mean mind and a sharp and audacious tongue. I’m destitute, helpless, terribly defeated and above all most insignificant. I see myself as patita, an extremely blameworthy, fallen kali yuga reject. I therefore see no recourse than to take full shelter of patita pavanam Sri Gauranga Mahaprabhu, Srila Nityananda Rama, Srila Prabhupada and all my holygodbrothers in conjuction with my efforts to performm kali yuga prema-dharma Hari nama sankirtan which is the most highly recomended means of deliverance for such fallen, wreched living entities as myself. Although I may not be so deserving, if you could grant me the privilage of being sufficiently beaten by all of your dandas and dragged through the streets of Vrndavan by the gates of the Gosvami’s temples so they can have one last look at their rascal no-good-for-nothing poor excuse for a so-called devotee before throwing mu remains in the Yamuna as a feast for the vrajavasi turtles (Food for Life!). Speaking offeast, before you do that, I have one last request, if you don’t mind. I know we should be prepared to give up all varieties of sense enjoyment for living int the holy dhama, but I have one lingering attachment in my heaert for some real cashew burfi which I haven’t tasted in more than 12 years. If I could at least get just one more piece beofer I die, I would be gratified.


Anyway, at least you should know that I have no i terest in parading around with delusions of grandeur that I’m a nitya-siddha (nitya mukta) avatar with the puffed up vanity of being a Godsent incarnation of one of Radha and Krsna nitya parikar or any other such bunk. The infinitesimal jiva can never beocme sva-tantra as the svarupa shakti counterpart expansions of divinity such as Lalita, Vishaka, Nanda-Yasoda, Subal, Sridama or others. We are never free to act independently in that sense. The jiva is always of the dependent category. As such, we are never free; we are eternally either bound to the service of the material energy or bound to the service of the internal energy of Krsna. When a great soul, a mahatma, takes shelter of the daivim prakrti (Srimati Radharnai or any of Her expanded forms, including that of Sri Guru), that soul places him/herself as a sold out animal to its master with no independence of its own. In his perfectional state, he becomes associated with his chosen thtelary deity to the extent he or she is empowered to do so by Divine Grace. A nitya-siddha avatar necessarily alrealdy has the preactuated sat-cit-ananda-deha. He never loses his vsty-siddhi by coming to this material world.


If a baddha jiva will unfortunately cop the egotistical vanity of beigh more greatly elevated than he actually is, then such a false ego becomes the greatest stumbling block to his progress on the path of perfection and simultaneously cheats those who associate with him (disciples etc.). Such a pretentious pride directly undermines the necessary humility required for realizing the need to sincerely cry out for the mercy of those who can actually give it and dupes a less intellegent following into accepting him to be capeable of displaying powers that are not at all within his means. Thus he jeopardizes his own progress as well as the progress of others. WE see this many times in the cases of sahajiyas phoney baloney imposter so-called gurus who unfortunately mislead their innocent disciples by preying on their immature, sentimental approach to spiritual life. This kind of malady has its grosser and more subtle manifestations. We all have seen within our experience less than properly qualified so-called gurus presenting themselves to their disciples as fully self-realized parmahamsas just to fall flat on their faces due to their pompus immitation of a status higher than their actual platform of realization. I’m not at all interested in perpetuating any variety of such farsical displays of pseudo devotional characatures.



In the purport to the fifth verse of Sri Upadesamrita, Srila Prabhupada says, “However, one should not imitate the behavior of an advanced devotee or maha-bhagavata without being self realized, for by such immitation one will eventually become degraded.” Furhter along he says, “One should not become a spiritual master unless he has attained the platform of uttama adhikari.”Still further, “A disciple should be careful to accept an uttama adhikari as a spiritual master.” Although some may not very much appreciate, I always give stress to these points whenever the questions about anyone giving or taking initiation come my way. I never present myself as an uttama adhikari, but rather decline to accept even one disciple until I’m thoroughly convinced I have well attained that status. I’m not for sale. I take shelter of these merciful instructions to give the time I need to come to that position first. “It is best not to accept any disciples.” (S.P., C.C. Mad.7.130 p.p.)


I’ld say I’m doing pretty good. So fa, after so many years, so good. Knock on wood. Not even one disciple. Pat me on the back! I’m not so proud of it though. “One can attain Krsna consciousness or divine life at once, within a second - or one may not attain such a state of life even after millions of births. it is only a matter of understanding and accepting the fact.” (S.P., B.G. 2.72 p.p.). Fie on me!!! How many seconds slip by without my doing what is needed to induce Their Lordships to mercifully elevate me to the stages of bhava and prema. Prema bhakti yaha hoite avidya vinasa yathe. I can’t blame anyone except myself for my lack of advancement in Krsna consciousness. People are in distress due to want of Krsna prema, yet what solution do I offer? I don’t have, so how can I give? I haven’t the fitness to provide all the transendental necessities. I couldn’t do the real work. Only make show. We say “prema, prema” but there is no prema.Only in the pages of a book. Big, big monkey, big, big belly, jumping Lanka melancholy.


Anyway, I should at least get a gold star for being sincere - but how sincere? People see me superficially however they prefer, but I rather see myself as a white aboriginy (nigger) living my life like an insect pretending to be some kind of a vaishnava, so hopefully the devotees of the Hare Krsna movement will tolerate my existence and not kick me away. I came form such a terribly degrade background. I pray may I naver go back to that condition. The Hare Krsna movement saved me. I can’t even begin to imagine another life. Even say I would be supposedly having the “sahajiya” tendencies some people think they see in me, it’s still a step above the impersonal tendency to reduce oneself and others to heartless numerical intergers, kogs in the machine, numbers on the score board. Hip hip hurrah! But did we learn to love Krsna?


Are there no feelings in there? No enchantment? Only the duty boundedness at best? No attraction with the hopes of one’s heartfelt seva bhavana being relished by Sri Krsna, the enjoyer of all mellows (rasa)? No serious pursuit of the Lord’s prema? Only the politely put “ Shut up and do your work! Don’t ask these kinds of questions, and don’t expect us to actually be competent to adequately satisfy such inquiries. The society will save them (somehow or other). We are Prabhupada disciples. Sons of the high court judje, that’s all. (Don’t expect anyone to easily attain the ultimate goal of life under our insufficient guidance.).


Money is the honey.” If the questions are hotter than we can handle, pass the potatoes. Put ‘em on the back burner; smash ‘em up if you have to. Prabhupada was a genius! He gave us all the pat answeres. How convenient! “First deserve, then desire.” (S.P.) “Work now, samadhi later.” (S.P.) Wonderful. Work at what, prabhus? “We have to preach about preaching about preaching that we’ew supposed to preach about preaching about how we’re supposed to preach, prabhujis. No time to concider very deeply the purpose behind all this. That’s for bhajananandis; heaven forbid. We’re work-a-holicks. Isn’t that good enough?” Push them back. Post date check. Keep the faith, baby. Just now coming... if you’re lucky. “We don’t really have to be so qualified to be guru.” Monkeys with broken tails. You know the story. “This is the fashion!” Don’t hold your breath. Fresh air anyone? Where is Krsna?!” No time for that. We have our overwhelming preaching and managerial responsibilities.” Imagine what we would be like if we were all fully Krsna conscious; free from envy. What good we could do for everyone. That much contribution we should be willing to make. There’s no substitute.” Chant and be happy” (S.P.)... Hare Krsna, that is... Everything is in the holy name. Shoot for the rhinoceros.


You should know I’m definitely a despicable reprobate. I don’t expect anyone to see any good in me. Any appearent goodness you might chance to see is simply a reflection of your won superexcellence... or perhaps your colorful imagination. If you insist, then I would rather suggest it is not good in me but about me as borrowed mercy plumes decorating an otherwise pathetic nobody. Vaishnava’s mercy, Krsna-Balarama’s mercy, Radhe-Syama’s mercy, and the mercy of the holy names are my only refuge, my only solice and hope. The plume decorations don’t serve to glorify me but to exult thhe power of the mercy of Krsna and His representatives. Otherwize where and what would I be? Those who flatter us are our worst enemies.


We welcome critisism as it forces us to be more introspective; to again and again take inventory to re-evaluate the condition of our hearts, not to become as a mutual admiration society. Thief, thief-cousin, brother. Still, there is need to appreciate the good in others. kaler dosa nidhe rajan. kali yuga is an ocean of faults. WE could hardly expect to see anything but faults. Asti eka mahat guna. Even still there is one great redeeming quality. What is that? Kirtanad eve krsnasya mukta snaga param vrajet; that simply by doing Krsna kirtan we will certainly be delivered from the ocean of material existence to the supreme abode; back home, back to Godhead. In truth, this is actually the only outstanding quality we could expect to see about anyone in this age.


I am basically a spiritual derelict. I know I’m not qualified; that’s why I’m not champing at the bit to pose as anyone’s guru. First, how to become an accomplished diciple. I’m not against politics because political intrigue is there even in the spiritual world. It serves to thicken the plot. Nevertheless, I find that it’s not as sweet and relishable as nama bhajan. It’s a question of taste, that’s all. Raso varjam rasopyasya, parm dristva nivartante. By filling our glass with milk (nectar) we automatically driev out the ink (poison). I may have yet to attain the stages of bhava and prema. Not withstanding, I should hope to have received at least a little mercy on account of all this Hare Krsna chanting. You loudly sing Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare from the heart for a minimum of 6-12 hour every day for 15-20 years and see what happens to you! The real mercy is the kirtan itself.


My foremost desire is to die in Vrndavan Dhama singing sing Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare, Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare at the top of my lungs for the pleasure of Guru and Gauranga. Can you understand my heart? Srila Prabhupada said that we should have high aspirations. So sometimes in my enthusiasm to pursue those aspirations, I naturally tend to internally see myself in terms of what I want to be for Krsna. if you see any fault in that, please forgive me. But I ask you, do you think my vanity should be exclusively confined to the point that I am a one ten thousanth part of a hair tip subatomic brahman paticle floating around on the life airs of aa theraputically engaged rotting corpse of a temporary externally manifest tabernacle called Aindra Dasa?


Ultimately, my internal aspirations and heart felt desires for eternal service at the lotus feet of my guru and Krsna are none of your business. No one has the right to pry into these affairs; nor do I have the inclination to share them with anyone and everyone. Loose lips sink ships. Why should I share my heart’s treasures with you or anyone else? That is between me and Srila Prabhupada. You have no access unless I choose to make accessible. No access. Off limits. Mind your own business. Still, at least the basic principles of sambandha tattva, abhideya tattva, and prayojana tattva should be properly discussed. The neophytes are mad after so many things. Better to be mad after Krsna. Buddha bhava sasmanvitah. “Meetings, resolutions, revolutions, no solutions... better to do kirtan.” (S.P.) Ei nechi ausaudhi maya, nasibaro lagi, hari nama maha0mantra lao tumi magi. I strongly feel that there would be a lot less problems in our movement if all the devotees of all ranks would be encouraed to do more hari nama sankirtan. More time for getting the higher taste of sankirtan rasa. Less time for all the bickering.


The process of Krsna consciousness actually works, but we have to ouse our brains to understand its deeper application if we are to experience the superior results. maybe Ted Patrick was right; “Mindless robots”. Don’t be dull headed.” (S.P.” “Strain your brain... how to pus on this Krsna consciousness movement.” (S.P.) Realization of one’s eternal relationship with Krsna will greatly enhance one’s preaching work. We have to preach according to our level of realization; not that after 25 or 30 years in the movement we still haven’t any idea who we are in reality and anxious to be guru. All this madness. Doctor heal thyself. If I can’t see clearly, how can i help others to clearly see? Only so much mouthing off.... in the name of preaching. What depths of realization do I have to shake with anyone? Who am I? Oh, very good. I realize that when I, with my uncontrolled tongue, stuff my belly too full with maha prasadam, I have a tendency to dream excessively; and if I actually speak according to my realizations, so many with less than sufficient adhikara will undoubtedly totally misunderstand. Why bother. Better to take the humble position and learn to control my tongue.


The problem I see with many devotees is that inspite of joining the greatest movement on Earth and getting practically the greatest, most merciful spiritual master of all time and in spite of cleverly giving so much lip service to the philosophy etc., still, they don’t really believe there isi a Krsna. It’s really simply a question of sraddha. There really is a Krsna. Are you convinced? We can actually experience Him by His grace. He gives that experience from His side. He is not dependent on our philosophical outlook. Yet, He is bhava-grah; Janardana. He gives Himself to us according to our attitude towards Him. Ye yatha mam prapadyante tams tathaiva bhajamy aham.


Therefore Srila Prabhupada, as all of our acharyas, always strongly advocated,emphasized and encouraged pure devotional service, the anukula seva bhavana; not pratikula like Kamsa or Sisulal. Anukulena Krsnanu-silanama. Uttamana bhakti-nista, Krsna bhajan nista, to practice the favorable means to please Krsna in pursuit of the principle on which prema is based. Krsnendriya priti iccha dare “prema” nama. To desire to satisfy Krsna, that is the basis of Krsna pream. To try to satisfy Gaura (the giver of Krsna prema) by the performance of sankirtan yajna, that is the basis of Gaura prema. And to try to satisfy our guru by honoring his instructions, even the small ones, that is the basis of guru prema, without which, there is no question of Gaura prema or Radha-Krsna prema. Also, to realize that we are always deficient and therefore need all the mercy we can get.


In this kali yuga, when it gets down to it, guru krpa is the main thing. So we have to actually cry out (tvam akincana gocaram) with feeling from a repentant heart. That is sankirtan and that is sadhu sangam, Bhagavat seva, murty seva and dhama vasa. It’s not so much what we do, but the attitude. That is important. They don’t need our patrams and puspams. Yo me bhaktya prayachati. Guru and Krsna respond to the antara bhavanam. Giving up unecessary attachments to extraneous dharma, artha, kama and moksa, go for prema by right means in spite of ourselves. Where there’s a will there’s a way. Prema pumarto mahan. With determination, like the sparrow trying to retrieve her lost eggs from the ocean. Our Garuda-like guru may see our sincere efforts and come to our aid. It is actually like that. What hope is there otherwize. Advancement in pure devotional service doesn’t have to be such a difficult thing. Only there should be no alterior motives, that’s all.




Braja-sundari Dasi - August 8, 2010 8:40 pm

Part 2


Now, at this point, one may presume that if a devotee admits that he knows who he is, then he must be indirectly flaunting his supposed attainment of bhava-siddhi or svarupa-siddhi. To redress this suspicion so as to preclude all doubt, we should properly understand that three stages of bhakti are delineated in Rupa Goswami’s bhakti-rasamrta-sindhu; sahana bhakti, bhava bhakti, and prema bhakti. Many times I have seen that devotees mistakenly equate raganuga bhakti with bhava bhakti, the stage at which one is a siddha bhakta, above the state of bondage or beyond the clutches of the illusory energy. This is clearly a misconception.


Their notion is that one cannot follow the path of raga bhakti unless he is a perfectly liberated, fully self realized siddha purusha. This confusion obviously arises from a casual or even careless reading of the acaryas’ vani. The correct decision is this: There two types of devotees, the sadhaka and the siddha. The siddha bhaktas are undoubtedly at upper stages of bhava and prema having actualized the perfect conception of their siddha svarupa (bhava deha) as per the realization of stayi bhava or constant, spontaneous aprakrta ecstatic mood of approach to Krsna’s eternal relationship. The ordinary human beings are elevated to these stages of perfection either by ardent practices of sadhana bhakti or by the ahaituki krpa of Lord Krsna or Krsna’s devotees or by a combination of both processes.


The siddhas certainly know who they are. The sadhaka bhakta is one who has yet to be elevated to the perfectional stages of bhava bhakti or prema bhakti and is rather earnestly engaged in the practices of sadhana bhakti with degrees of resolution and aspiration to ultimately attain perfection. Although a pure sadhaka may be considered to be free from material contamination in the sense that he has at least achieved nistha as a madhyama adhikari pure devotee via anartha nivriti, still, he is deemed to be in a state of bondage on account of his having yet achieved neither svarup siddhi nor vastu siddhi both of which are far beyond the material bodily concept of life. This stage of sadhana bhakti is clearly seen to be having not one but two categorical departments with their separately distinguishable features, namely vaidhi sadhana bhakti and raganuga sadhana bhakti.


Sadhakas exclusively attached to vaidhi sadhana bhakti are known as vaidhi bhaktas who attain the spiritual realms where reverential devotion predominates. Those who become attached to raganuga sadhana bhakti are raganuga bhaktas who ultimately attain the supramundane realm of Vraja-Dhama at Goloka itself. The unfortunate warring which apparently goes on sometimes between the two plainly stems from inadequate knowledge of the subject, either from one side or the other or both. Needless to say, no one attains much of anything unless he gives up any traces of false egoistical pride and envy. Anyway, without going into a more detailed analysis as to cause and effect, it should suffice to say that those who have fortunately gained entrance into raga bhajan must also be knowing who they are, as their sadhana necessarily involves the internal contemplation of their own aspired to eternal identity as conferred upon them by the spiritual master. If it is not to be seen in one’s sadhana, we could hardly expect to see it in one’s sadhya. The raganuga sadhaka may certainly know who he/she is though he/she has yet to fully realize the thing. Although there will be some epistemological contrast, it may be compared to theoretical knowledge (jnana) as distinguished from realized knowledge (vijnana). We should not, therefore, jump to the conclusion that someone saying that he knows who he is must be a definite indication of his having attained bhava siddhi or prema siddhi or that he is necessarily intending to show himself to have as such.


At a meeting with H.H. Gopal Krsna Maharaja, Srutikirti prabhu, Pancagauda prabhu, Jaya Sila prabhu and a few godsisters, I readily agreed to their request that I should apologize to the gurukula alumni (boys and girls) to help pacify and mend their wounded feelings so they wouldn’t take it as yet another reason to become disenfranchised, considering ISKCON not to be the one big happy family that it’s supposed to be and decide to leave the shelter of Srila Prabhupada’s one big happy family. In the course of my apology, since Sanjay was also present (this was before he came to my door to beg forgiveness), I begged them to mercifully overlook my apparently meager devotional conduct and reiterated the point I had previously made to Sanjay that they should please not misunderstand that I was acting from the male chauvinistic platform with the materially designated consciousness as a frustrated brahmacari.


On noticing their rather worked-up, indignant disposition, I told in somewhat of a humorous way to support my point that “Although I am very fallen, still I would venture to say that in the course of my advancement in Krsna consciousness, I have probably realized myself to be more spiritually “female” than a lot of the women in our movement.” I didn’t say, “You don’t realize that I’m more female than you are”, referring to my “supposedly being a gopi or more specifically a manjari”, pleeease!! There was never any such discussion concerning any such deeper, esoteric subject matters as manjari bhava or this bhava or that. I would never even consider discussing any such things in such an assembly. Apano bhajana katha, na kahibe jata tatha (Prema Bhakti Chandrika).


Why has such an audacious inference been impetuously extrapolated as if seeking to burn witches (manjaris) at the stake? Is someone suffering from the post gopi-bhava club paranoia syndrome, that we should think to superimpose our fears here, there and everywhere we imagine such ghostly absurdities? Who’s wearing the X-ray specs around here anyway? First investigate, then speculate, then agitate. To assume makes an ass out of u and me. ASSUME. Are we assuming that Aindra is insinuating by all this that he is “a gopi or more specifically a manjari”? Who says I’m a manjari?! I never said I was a manjari.


One of the main objections I had about the “gopi bhavakas’” preaching aside from some of them obvious, attempting to capitalize by trying to pose themselves as ISKCON’s newly emerged, highly elevated rasa-acaryas (for preaching, prabhus) was their fallacious conclusion that those coming into the fold of the Rupanuga sampradaya can only have access to none other than the madhurya bhajan seen in the writings of our predecessor acaryas for attaining the manjari bhava in their sadhya (outcome of spiritual practices). I beg your pardon!!! Even Krsna can’t convince me to become a manjari if I don’t want to become a manjari. I’ll wrestle Him and we’ll see who wins!


Srila Prabhupada, in his Science of Self Realization says, “This Krsna consciousness movement aims at teaching people how to become gopi-janas, or pure lovers of Krsna.” Objectively speaking, no one will argue about this being the highest goal attainable for the members of this movement. Nevertheless, only two paragraphs later, the same Srila Prabhupada mercifully asserts, “This Krsna consciousness movement can enable everyone to go to Krsnaloka and become Krsna’s associate as a friend, servant, father, or mother. Krsna is agreeable to take any of these positions in relation to His devotee. To realize our relationship with Krsna, we have but to follow in the footsteps of Lord Caitanya and His chief associates, the six Gosvamis... “These Gosvamis were always engaged in chanting Hare Krsna and dancing in ecstasy. They taught that when one is merged in Krsna-kirtan, or the chanting of the holy names of Krsna, he merges into the ocean of love of Krsna.”


It should be carefully noted that during Mahaprabhu’s sankirtan lilas, many types of devotees with different internal devotional sentiments would be simultaneously present, participating together without aggressively antagonizing each other. Hare nama prabhu is akhila rasamrta siindu murti, an ocean of transcendental mellows. He (Hari nama) is bhava grahi Janardana as is nami, Krsna Himself. No one should begrudge another devotee’s heartfelt hopes and aspirations to eternally serve his/her ista-devata. To conceitedly try to force upon another one’s own mood is first class nonsense. It is simply a disturbance in the society of devotees; this “You will eat it, and you will like it, heh, heh, heh” type of infringement on others’ devotional rights. Such narrow minded so-called gopi-bhava shenanigans could only be chaya-gopi-bhavabhasa at best.

You have your relationship with guru and Krsna and I have mine. It’s not all one.


You have your experiences in Krsna consciousness, your realizations, and I have mine. You have your mission, your way of preaching and I have mine. We should be more than witting ot make ample allowances for diverse individual expression within the context of the one underlying principle of pure devotional service. Can any of us say we know to what extent another devotee has become dear to guru and Krsna, that we should think we have the right to censure his or her genuine expressions of heartfelt dedication at the lotus feet of the Lord?


It’s not that simply by vapu seva, by physical proximity in time and space, that one has become closer to or dearer to our guru. That is the thinking of a prakrta bhakta. It’s like saying that just because a pujari is up there offering the arotik and touching the deity etc., that he has a closer, more intimate relationship with the deity and is more dear than the preachers who circumstantially serve the Lord in separation. That is not at all our siddhanta. It’s not even reasonable in the least. On the contrary, the noteworthy example of our Srila Prabhupada, who had relatively very few meetings with His Divine Grace Om Visnupada Paramahansa Parivrajakacarya Sri Srimad Bhaktisiddhanta Saraswati Goswami Prabhupada, most effectively serves to vividly illustrate the true principle with all due respect to his senior godbrothers, many of whom, in spite of their gurus intimacy, very irresponsibly dismantled the solidarity of his mission, the Gaudiya Math.


Vrndavan is Srila Prabhupada’s home. “...if it is possible, one should go and physically be present at Vrajabhumi, Vrndavan, and be engaged always in the service of the Lord, following the devotees in Vraja-dhama, the spiritual realm of Vraja. If it is not possible, however, to be physically present at Vrndavan, one can meditate anywhere upon living in that situation. Wherever he may be, one must always think about life in Vraja-dhama and about following in the footsteps of a particular devotee in the service of the Lord.” (S.P., N.O.D)


seva sadhaka-rupena

siddha-rupena catra hi

tad-bhava-lipsuna karya



“In the transcendental realm of Vraja (Vraja-dhama) one should serve the Supreme Lord, Sri Krsna, with a feeling similar to that of His Associates, and one should place himself under the direct guidance of a particular associate of Krsna and should follow in his footsteps. This method is applicable both in the stage of sadhana (spiritual practices executed while in the stage of bondage) and in the stage of sadhya (God realization), when one is a siddha-purusa, or a spiritually perfect soul.” (Rupa, included in N.O.I.)



Srila Prabhupada mentions in this connection that one can actually aspire to follow in the footsteps of the devotees in Vrndavan only after the stage of liberation from material contamination; in other words, after one comes to the platform of anartha nivrtti and attains steadiness in devotional life (nistha) as a madhyam adhikari, having taken diksa for the bona fide spiritual master. However, even if one receives diksa from the best guru, if he continues to maintain material attachments under the bodily conception of “I and mine” and neglects to immerse himself in the nectarean ocean of sankirtan rasa, he will certainly remain on the kanistha platform, depriving himself of the sweetness of selfless sacrifice on which the paragon of Vraja bhakti is based.


How many meals does anyone miss over his serious desperation for self realization? How serious does serious have to get before serious could be considered serious enough? How much sleep has anyone missed over the thing? How wet does anyone’s pillow get; at night, when no one else but the Lord is awake to watch the show? Are we satisfied to fill up our bellies (kitchen religion) and go on day in and day out, weak after month after year after year in our ignorance of the truth of who we really are? It’s good enough just to be a “Prabhupada man”? That may be a pretty good start if we could at least have that to say for ourselves, but what does that actually mean in the ultimate sense?


If the same soul who appeared in the A.C. Bhaktivedanta Swami Prabhupada Acharya svarupa reappeared in a different family with a different gold-plated boy body with a different face and name etc. to preach in a different capacity, perhaps in an ever more revolutionary way, would we even recognize the person to be our self-same guru standing before us? Would we be ready to surrender and accept the feet of he who would now appear to be no more than 20 years of age? Or would we have to grow old and die to be reborn in order to see him as the quaint elderly Indian sadhu again before we would be willing to respect and get behind him. If he came to the guest house this evening, would anyone pay him any mind? Or would it be, “No. Sorry sir. Jai Prabhupada! Jai Prabhupada! Hum, ho! I’m Prabhupada man. Sorry, no rooms. Please take food-for-life, otherwise, pay!”


Srila Prabhupada is not that body anymore than we are these bodies. What made his gold plated box glorious and fully spiritualized was the great soul who was within that body. His body is tadiya and therefore worshipable, but it is not the person although qualitatively as good as the person. The person is the soul, please. So how much more important to come to know the person, the soul. It must necessarily go beyond externals, not only to the essential message of the person but also to the solid gold box person proper who gave that essential message. This is full realization of guru asraya which will be achieved upon the full satisfaction of our guru by his mercy, so help us God.


God helps those who help themselves; so better get damn serious.

My personal realization is that our Srila Prabhupada is certainly that eternal resident of Vraja-dhama whom we may follow to realize the perfection of Vraja bhakti in one of the five kinds of transcendental relationships. It distresses me that devotees of all varieties come all the way to Vrindavan saying, “Jai Prabhupada! Jai Prabhupada!” but not very much caring to deeply concern themselves with what Prabhupada, the eternal Vrajavasi conclusively stands for; what he ultimately wants to give us. Lord Krsna sent Uddhava to Vrndavan not so much for delivering His message to the gopis, but to mercifully grant Uddhava the opportunity to see something wonderful in the intense unalloyed devotional spirit of the Vrajavasis’s highest class of prema, unmatched by any devotee of any other realm. That darshan of the Vraja gopis served to both humble him and also inspire him to deeply hanker for a similar degree of intensity and purity in his own devotional mood. Krsna wanted to give him a chance to deepen his own service attitude by appreciating something of a higher order; something immaculately sublime.


Similarly, by establishing the Krsna-Balaram Mandir at Sri Vrindavan dhama, Srila Prabhupada has opened the door for scientifically understanding and appreciating the true nature of Vraja bhakti in all its aspects as an impetus to upgrade our own standards of pure devotional genius and actually realize something very beautiful about ourselves. It’s simply a question of intelligently recognizing the extent of Srila Prabhupada’s mercy and taking advantage. Otherwize, we miss the pint. We miss the opportunity.


This movement will mean for us individually what we make of it for ourselves and others. A room or house can serve as a bhajan kutir or as a brothel according to the disposition and conduct of the inhabitants there in. If one is seriously absorbed in his bhajan kriya, then for him, his kutir is truly a bhajan kutir. On the other hand, the same “house” with the same infrastructure becomes like a brothel when small-minded guru bogus prostitute their real self interest, their guru’s highest ideal, to ostensibly engage in gross and subtle illusory sense gratificatory pursuits on the pretext of devotional culture. We come to Vrndavan for doing business, for vacation (liberation) purposes, to create the comfortable niches for ourselves, for “wife” shopping, for (imposter) “husband” shopping, for chewing the thorny twigs, eating, sleeping, mating and defending like any other dog, hog, camel or ass, for political absorption, endless faultfinding and talking all kinds of useless prajalpa, for becoming entangled in so many pressing and depressing managerial crisis’s, for collecting a few more neophyte disciples, for practically anything and everything but deeply entering into the experience of what it really means to be a vrajavasi. “That’s not for us. That’s for bhajananandis (spit), for sahajiyas (double spit).”


Mature spiritual intelligence means to see things in the proper light, to awaken our higher sensibilities; not whimsically but by seriously taking shelter of the holy names, following in the footsteps of the six gosvamis under the merciful guidance of our guru. To advance in Krsna consciousness, we have to be prepared, ready for revolution, for evolution. Real revolution means to change our parameters; to internally evolve, to go beyond our relatively confined conceptions of the way we think things are or should be, to broaden, to elevate our outlook to accommodate a higher dimensional reality.


Otherwize, we ourselves become the impediment to our own progress. We create an impasse for ourselves and possibly for the others upon whom we try to impress our unconversant, none the wiser scheme of things. It is seen, unfortunately, that some people have the tendency to ignore or hastily reject information that appears to go against their preconceptions. They really do prefer to disregard, deride, disparage, flout, condemn, oppress, suppress or even annihilate the things they don’t understand. Many times, such is a defense mechanism born of an insecurity complex which very often ironically manifests as an arrogation of superiority.


I humbly submit here with that Sri Vrndavan Dhama is quite a different soil. We are not to intrude upon that soil, bringing with us our own little orbit of any type of substandard material or spiritual conditioning to make Vrajendranandana Krsna and His votaries dance on our stage according to our tune. We should actually have to come crawling with straw between our teeth, begging to have the privilege of surrendering to the Dhama’s own influence. For example, in Vrndavan, we don’t offer bhoga to the deities according to the pancaratriki system to make for a karma-free diet. Everything cooked in Vrndavan is already prasadam; we don’t offer to the deity to make it prasadam as we do in the other temples in other parts of the world. To try to impose the understanding applicable in other temples to the deity worship here would be sheer misunderstanding, a veritable violation of Vraja law so to speak.


Srila Prabhupada instructed that in Vrndavan, we offer because we are to be concerned that Krsna should not go hungry. If He gets too hungry, he might go elsewhere to get something to eat; so to keep Him always with us to enjoy in our company, we feed Him very nicely so He doesn’t think to go anywhere else. In this way, Srila Prabhupada introduces us to the principle of bhava seva so prevalent in Vraja-Dhama. He wanted us to enter into that spirit, appreciate and be benefited. Although the priti of Vraja-dhama is really only to be found in the devotee who have attained Krsna’s direct pleasure dalliance in either the bhauma lilas or the Goloka lilas of the Lord, still, others, to attain such transcendental favors of Sri Krsna, can and, in truth, must diligently culture that spirit of such transcendental loving sentiment in principle when the cherishing of the hopes for the thing becomes prominently noticeable within one’s own introspective heart.


“My son, minutely study the nature of your own self. Cultivate the sentiment according to the liking produced from that nature. In pursuance of that sentiment, follow in the footsteps of the accomplished devotees having mastery over that sentiment. In so doing, you should only scrutinize your own trend of mind. If your mind is inclined to the path of loving devotion (Vraja-bhakti), then do according to that inclination; so long as you feel that your inclination towards loving devotion has not been firm and steady, you should go on with the vaidhi process of devotion with full confidence and application.” (Bhaktivinode Thakur, J.D.) It is important in this connection to recognize the need for honest self-examination. No cheating, now; please! The inclinations for either reverential devotion or devotion compelled by natural attraction to Vraja lila are born of two categorically distinct varieties of sraddha based on the accumulation of two types of bhaktyonmukhe sukriti.


That sukriti caused by knowingly or unknowingly associating with agents of reverential or Vaikuntha devotion, gives rise to the kind of regard or faith exclusively directed by scriptural injunctions and attendant arguments and reasonings. For those in whom the enchantment for the sweetness of the all-alluring pastimes of Sri Krsna of Vraja has not arisen, there is actually no recourse but to be contingent upon this type of sraddha for spiritual evolvement. The sukriti gained by knowingly or unknowingly associating with representative agents of Vraja bhakti from Vraja-dhama gradually engenders what is termed as lobhamayi sraddha characterized by a progressive development of an intense “greed” or covetousness to attain a similar type of attachment to Krsna as have the ragatmika bhaktas of Vraja-dhama. Sraddha of either category is considered as the seed of the creeper of either respective process of pure devotion which certainly requires appropriate nourishment for proper realization of the respective markedly distinct goals.


To be real, the sastra-visvasamayi-sraddha which produces the adhikara for vaidhi-bhakti alone can never in a million years generate the eligibility for pursuing the path of Vraja bhakti. Vaidhi bhaktas can gain access to the raga marg and the eligibility to pursue that path only after the good fortune of lobhamayi sraddha has been created in them by the graceful rasika vaisnava sanga. The mudha-kile neophytes with less than half a human brain unfortunately and very foolishly underestimate the adequacy of Srila Prabhupada’s transcendental preponderance. This is clearly due to a feeble minded lack of properly receptive, unadulterated service attitude. Atah sri krsna namadi na bhaved grahyam indriyaih. Not only Krsna’s name, form, and pastimes, but also Krsna’s devotees cannot be understood without developing the proper service attitude.


The point here being that as our Srila Prabhupada, the founder Acharya of practically the greatest mission ever seen for preaching the cult of Vrndavan the world over, and the foremost representative of an unbroken chain of fully self realized spiritual masters in the line of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu’s own personally handpicked rasa-acaryas, Sri Sri Rupa-Ragunatha, should be most intelligently recognized as not only a mahabhagavata but as a param-rasika-vaishnava acharya himself; it would be quite a blunder to remain oblivious to the obvious likelihood of the sparks of such lobhamayi sraddha appearing in the hearts of many of his followers, young and old, who all have the facility of associating with his personal ecstasies in the form of his Bhaktivedanta purports.


Srila Prabhupada has wonderfully sparked the good fortune of faith in the culture of Vraja-bhakti in so many of his followers, but the brutish mentality of the nama aparadhis cannot easily fathom the necessity and real urgency to fan the spark into the fire it’s meant to be. To build a fire of Krsna prema from the spark of sraddha takes considerable care and attention, as well as quite a lot of inspiration. Preaching means to enthuse, to give inspiration where there is no inspiration, to create faith where there is none; at least to acknowledge where there is a glimmer of hope and try to encourage the best we can. The appearance of regard and ensuing desires for Vraja bhakti should not be despised, disrespected, neglected, ignored or swept under the rug.


Not everyone wants to be a brute. So therefore, the leaders of this movement must be properly equipped in order to facilitate and promote the natural development of the devotional creepers of its members in all respects. It’s not that it’s not our duty to intelligently preach the pre-eminence of Vraja-dhama and the gopis’ superexcellent method of transcendental loving service. “Establish devotional service to Lord Krsna and Radharani in Vrndavan. You should also compile bhakti scripture and preach the bhakti cult from Vrndavan.” (C.C. Madhya 232.104) “This Krsna consciousness movement continues the tradition of the six Gosvamis, especially Srila Sanatana Gosvami and Srila Rupa Gosvami. Serious students of this Krsna consciousness movement must understand their great responsibility to preach the cult of Vrndavan (devotional service to the Lord) all over the world. We now have a nice temple in Vrndavan, and serious students should take advantage of it.. I am very hopeful that some of our students can take up this responsibility and render the best service to humanity by educating people in Krsna consciousness.” (C.C.Madhya. 23.104 p.p.)


It is clearly evident that Srila Prabhupada’s intention is to broadcast the mellows of Vraja bhakti to the world. At least we ourselves should very seriously ascertain the beauty of this highest goal so we might have the impetus to struggle through the quagmire of all our anarthas to reach it. It’s really a matter of how we focus our energies. If we have no serious interest, no taste, no inclination to aspire for such things after all Srila Prabhupada has said and done for us, what can anyone say or do to encourage us. There’s no wonder that ninety per cent of Prabhupada’s disciples have drifted away; that a painful percentage of sanyasins have given up their vows. It’s like the dog who sees a Rembrant Painting, smells it, licks it, chews it, tricks to fprnicate with it and when he understands that he’s not going to get what he wants out of it, he lifts his leg, passes urine on it and walks away without ever actually understanding the real value of the thing.


We have to see the things for what they really are “AS IT IS”, and help others to also see, to deeply penetrate this most subtle of all sciences, so we should not be dullheaded.

It should be carefully noted that svayam rupa Krsna, the incomparably charming young son of the undisputed king of the land of Vraja, Nanda Maharaja; that sweetest of all sweetness’s, the “debauchee” lover of Vrajeswari Sri Radha within the pleasure groves of the resplendent forest of Vraja only, is exclusively exalted by all the scriptures both directly and indirectly as the one without a second absolutely independent full-fledged Supreme Personality of Godhead. Ekala isvara Krsna, ara saba britya. “Krsna” in this sloka solely indicates Vrajendranandana Krsna, the Lord of Radha.


All other subordinate expansions including Vishnu, Narayan, Rama Vasudeva Krsna of Dvaraka and Mathura and even the svyam prakash expansions of Krsna, millions of Whom simultaneously danced by the side of each gopi during maha rasa lila, are in various ways both directly and indirectly serving the absolute desires of Svayam rupa Radha Krsna of Vraja. As these subordinate expansions have only up to ninety-three percent of the qualities and attributes of svayam rupa Krsna, our gaudiya vaisnava acaryas directly advise us to attach ourselves to focusing our service propensity upon the relationship with Radharani’s Svayam Rupa Krsna.


Radharani is so kind that by various transcendental maneuvers, she makes arrangements to share Her Krsna with others; and in doing so, derives ten million times the happiness She experiences in Her own direct association with Him. She is so kind that she goes out of Her way to reveal this secret to even such lowly creatures as ourselves. We have only to deeply appreciate, absorb, and embrace the model selfless, self-sacrificing, pleasure-giving mood of Her realm to gain access. The reciprocal dealings between mood Radha, Krsna, and Their devotees are never self-gratifying affairs. They overwhelm, conquer and control each other by Their mutual enthusiasm for transcendentally pleasing each other. Wouldn’t it be nice if we could become like Them?!


In His purport to the most confidential instruction of the Bhagavad Gita (which is only the ABC’s of the spiritual life Srila Prabhupada wanted to give us, * you.), Srila Prabhupada invites us, encourages us, instructs us, commands us, demands us to exclusively devote our heart to the svyam rupa Vrajendranandana Krsna, the darling of Yasoda, the friend of Subal, the lover of Radharani and all of the gopis - for anyone who cares to notice, are you still with me? Dandavats. “This words stress that one should concentrate his mind upon Krsna - the very form with two hands carrying a flute, the bluish boy with a beautiful face and peacock feathers in His hair. There are descriptions of Krsna found in the Brahma-Samhita and other literatures. One should fix his mind on this original form of Godhead, Krsna. One should not even divert his attention to other forms of the Lord; (Vishnu, Narayana, Rama, Varaha etc.).” S.P. B.G.18.65 p.p.


Instructions like these from our lord and master, Srila Prabhupada are actually solace for devotees who are beginning to relish gradual increments of feelings of separation through progressive attachment to Nandanandana, Gopal Krsna, Govinda, Giridhari, Gopijanavallabha, Shyama, Murari, Vamsi Bihari, Radha Mohana,Hari Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare!


“Unless ones mind is filled with thoughts of Krsna, feelings will be filled with material activities.” (S.P. C.C.) “A devotee therefore, must be attracted by the behavior of the inhabitants of Vrndavana who live in a direct relationship with Krsna. The land, water, cows, trees and flowers serve Krsna in santa rasa, Krsna’s servants serve Krsna in the dasya rasa, and Krsna’s cowherd friends serve Him in sakhya-rasa. Similarly the elderly gopis and gopa’s serve Krsna as father and mother, uncles and other relatives, and the gopis, the young girls serve Krsna in conjugal love. “While executing devotional service, one must be naturally inclined to serve Krsna in one of these transcendental relationships, that is the actual success of life.” (S.P. C.C.)


“When one fully engages in chanting the Hare Krsna maha mantra, he gradually realizes his own spiritual identity.” (S.P. N.O.I)

“This desiring some perfectional stage in spiritual life is not sense gratification. When one realizes something of his constitutional relationship with the Supreme Personality of Godhead, he understands his original position and wants to be reinstated in this position either as friend, servant, parent or conjugal lover of Krsna. That is called lalasamayi, or very eagerly desiring to go to ones natural position.” (S.P. NOD)


“One should feelingly pray and become eager to render his particular service to the Lord. This is the teaching of all great devotees, especially Lord Caitanya.”

“In other words, one should learn how to cry for the Lord. One should learn this small technique, and he should be very eager and actually cry to become engaged in some particular type of service. This is called laulyam or excessive eagerness for meeting and serving the Lord in a particular way, that is the price to enter into the kingdom of God. Otherwise there is no material calculation for the value of a ticket by which one can enter the kingdom of God. The only price for such entrance is this laulyam lalasamayi, or desire and great eagerness.” (S.P. NOD)



“I have no love for Krsna, nor for the causes of developing love of Krsna - namely hearing and chanting. And the process of bhakti-yoga, by which one is always thinking of Krsna - and fixing His lotus feet in the heart, is also lacking in me. As far as philosophical knowledge or pious works are concerned, I do not see any opportunity for me to execute such activities. But above all, I am not even born in a nice family. Therefore I must simply pray to you, Gopijana Vallabha (Krsna, the maintainer and beloved of the gopis) because you are dina dayal or merciful to the destitute. I simply wish and hope that some way or other I may be able to approach your lotus feet, and this hope is giving me pain because I think myself quite incompetent to approach that transcendental goal of life.” (Rupa Gos. NOD)



“Let the sharp moralist accuse me of being illusioned; I do not mind. Experts in vedic activities may slander me as being misled, friends and relatives may call me frustrated, my brothers may call me a fool, the wealthy * may point me out as mad, and the learned philosophers may assert that I am much too proud; still my mind does not budge an inch from the determination to serve the lotus feet of Govinda though I be unable to do it.” (Madhavendra Puri)


“It is not possible to give up desires. That is not possible. To give up desires means I am a dead body. If I have got life, if I am not a stone, there must be desires. If we make a desire it must be fulfilled. Krsna will give you facilities. Desire is so strong. We must change the platform to no material desires (Akincana) by simply desiring how to serve Krsna. Desire continues as long as life remains within the body. Accepting Krsna’s desire as our desire is spiritual life. If you simply take a vow that “from this day my life dedicated to Krsna... “I surrender”... from that day you become free.” (S.P. lect.)


“Without hesitation, one should take the exclusive shelter of Lord Krsna with full confidence, giving up bad association and even neglecting the regulative principles of the four varnas and four asramas. That is to say one should abandon all material attachments.”

“After giving up all kinds of religions and occupational duties, if you come to Me, the Supreme Personality of Godhead and take shelter, I shall give you protection from all life’s sinful reactions. Do not worry. (It should be noted here that this verse of Bhagavad Gita simply denotes the basic principle of sraddha as a prerequisite for determined bhajana kriya).

“Lord Krsna is very kind to His devotees. As is always very grateful and magnanimous, and he possesses all abilities. A learned man does not give up Krsna to worship anyone else.”


“My dear Lord, You are very affectionate to Your devotees. You are also a truthful and grateful friend. Where is that learned man who would give You up and surrender to someone else? You fulfill all the desires of Your devotees, so much so that sometimes You even give Yourself to them. Still, you neither increase nor decrease by such activity.”


“Whenever an experienced person develops real knowledge of Krsna and His transcendental qualities (sambandha tattva jnana), he naturally gives up all other engagements and renders service to the Lord. Uddhava gives evidence concerning this:

“Oh how wonderful it is! Putana the sister of Bakasura, wanted to kill Krsna, by smearing deadly poison on her breast and having Krsna take it. None the less, Lord Krsna accepted her as His mother, and thus she attained the destination befitting Krsna’s mother. Of whom should I take shelter but Krsna, who is so merciful?

(Here Mahaprabhu, in His instructions to Sanatana Goswami on the process of devotional service, is presenting reasons why one should have this sraddha or strong faith in Krsna and now He will discuss the characteristics (laksana) of one who has this strong faith.)


“There are two kinds of devotees - those who are fully satiated and free from all material desires and those who are fully surrendered to the lotus feet of the Lord. Their qualities are one and the same, but those who are fully surrendered to Krsna’s lotus feet are qualified with another transcendental quality - atma samarpana, full surrender without reservation. (atma-samarpana may also be taken to mean offering of ones whole self (body, mind and soul) up to the lotus feet of Krsna).


“The six divisions of surrender are the acceptance of those things favorable to devotional service, the rejection of unfavorable things, the conviction that Krsna will give protection, the acceptance of the Lord as ones guardian or master (to be exclusively dependant on His mercy), full self surrender (to have no separate interest than His interest), and humility. (Srila Bhaktivinode Thakure in his Jaiva Dharma asserts thus: By virtue of good deeds of many previous births when one hears topics about Hari, affirm conviction in Hari grows in ones mind - that conviction is called sraddha or regard. With the growth of regard comes the spirit of surrender (saranagati) - regard and surrender are practically synonymous. -he who has got this sort of conviction is eligible to have pure devotion.’


The import is this, that in truth unless is qualified with such fully surrendered disposition, he cannot even be seen to be having this sraddha which is only the preliminary requisite for getting himself initiated by a bona fide spiritual master. (Jignasu sreyah uttamam) Srila Prabhupada comment: When a living entity is fully surrendered he is under the direct protection of Krsna and Krsna gives him all intelligence by which he can advance in spiritual realization.”)

Braja-sundari Dasi - August 8, 2010 8:43 pm

Part 3


“One whose body is fully surrendered takes shelter at the holy place where Krsna had His pastimes (Vrndavan), and he prays to the Lord: ‘My Lord, I am yours’. Understanding this within his mind, he enjoys spiritual bliss.


“When a devotee thus fully surrenders unto Krsna’s lotus feet, Krsna accepts him as one of His confidential associates. (The word tat-kale in this sloka means ‘immediately’. He doesn’t wait. Neophytes (prakrta bhaktas) are not seen to be having this degree of firm faith. When by associating with pure devotees (second class or first class) one receives scientific knowledge of Krsna, his conviction in Krsna consciousness becomes solidified enabling him to cross the threshold of (second class Vaisnavism) devotional service in practice by taking the vaisnava diksha from Krsna’s bona fide representative. At that time, the disciples ‘fixed up’ surrendered approach (‘from this day on, I am yours’) is recognized by Krsna who not only accepts him as His ward but munificently accepts him as one of His confidential associates (devotees) gradually revealing to him all the innermost secrets of His heart. Sincere association with Krsna through the medium of pure devotional service is both the means and the ends.


This is confirmed elsewhere in Caitanya Caritamrita: ‘At the time of initiation, when a devotee fully surrenders unto the service of the Lord, Krsna accepts him to be as good as Himself.’ (C.C. Antya 4.192) ‘An associate of the Lord is one whose body is fully engaged in the service of the Lord’. (C.C. Antya 4.197 p.p.)


However as Mahaprabhu instructs Srila Rupa Goswami, ‘If one is infected with the desire for material enjoyment or material liberation (indicating his basic lack of sraddha), he cannot rise to the platform of pure loving service onto the Lord, even though he may superficially reader devotional service according to the routine regulative principles.” (Show bottle devotion, for “preaching” prabhus; put on your sankirtana smile!) “Krsna says, ‘If one engages in My transcendental loving service but at the same time wants the opulence of material enjoyment, he is very very foolish. Indeed he is just like a person who gives up ambrosia to drink poison.” Finally Lord Caitanya cites the following Bhagavatam verse to summarize the principles of sambandha, abhideya and prayojana.).


“The living entity who is subjected to birth and death attains immortality when he gives up all material activities, dedicates his life to the execution of My order, (the results of sambandha tattva jnana) and acts according My directions, (bhakti abhideya). In this way he becomes fit to enjoy the spiritual bliss derived from exchanging loving mellows with me (prayojana siddhi).”(C.C.)



Krsna consciousness is simple for the simple. Godhead is light; nescience is darkness. Where there is Godhead there is no nescience. The sunlight is there, but we prefer to continue to *in our * caves. By desire we come to this material world and by desire we get out. It is we who prolong our ignorance and suffering by the habitual misuse of our independence. Jiva jago, jiva jago... enechi ausadhi maya nasibaro lagi hari-nama maha-mantra lao tumi magi. Hare Krsna Hare Krsna Krsna Krsna Hare Hare Hare Rama Hare Rama Rama Rama Hare Hare! We hear the message but we don’t really hear, even after so many years, so many lifetimes. It is we who postpone our happiness, our progress to perfection; our surrender even. It is our irresponsibility. We procrastinate; put off till tomorrow. More important items on the agenda; places to go, people to meet, wars to win, books to write (for preaching prabhus!); but do we know who we are? Did we learn to love Krsna? Did we even once taste the nectar of the holy name (suddha nama)?


Books are the basis, futility is the principle, purity is a force, and preaching is the excuse We’ve climbed ISKCON social ladder, corporate ladder; We’ve got our mitts on the men and the money (for preaching prabhus!). We’ve learned how to say “Jai Prabhupada, Jai Prabhupada!”, but have we genuinely learned the menial service attitude, what it really means to be a disciple, a representative of this great disciplic succession, an unbroken chain of fully self realized spiritual masters? “Better they bring me my shoes.“ (S.P.) Do you think bringing Prabhupada his shoes is such a simple thing? Krsna consciousness is simple for the simple, simply wonderful! Simply we have to surrender, that’s all. It’s a “gradual” process. As “gradual” as you want to make it. “Can’t means won’t.” (S.P.) If we had the desire, if we really wanted, we could surrender in a moment, like Katvanga Maharaja, couldn’t we?


We can’t officially rubberstamp paramahamsas; nor can we ear mark who will get guru and Krsna’s mercy, ultimately. Guru and Krsna are not bound by any dogmatic, stereotypical religious or institutional convention. They can by their own sweet will accept anyone at anytime. Their mercy is ever progressive and unpredictable. They can make the insignificant become magnificent and the great become totally unimportant and puny. That decision is in their hands. They and their ways are inconceivable, achintya. Things are not always the way we expect them to be. Things don’t always happen the way we expect them to happen.


A pig in Vrndavana is greater than a Lord Brahma. The ants get to go back to Godhead. One dust grain of Vrndavana contains all the material and spiritual worlds. One dust grain can give you love of Godhead. A lame man can cross mountains. Blind man can see the firmament. Dumb man can recite eloquent poetry and sweetly sing the holy names. Hell becomes better than vaikuntha. Vaikuntha appears to be like hell. Human reason fails to fathom the extent of Lord Caitanya’s benevolence. Even an insignificant dirty ol’ skunk like me can hope to cross the ocean of material existence and obtain the mercy of Krsna. Simply by remembering Lord Caitanya, the most difficult things become extremely easy and by forgetting Lord Caitanya, even the easiest things become extremely difficult.


Once Srila Prabhupada was asked, “How can I become sincere?” Prabhupada answered, “By being sincere”. It’s simply a matter of understanding the fact, accepting the fact and acting in that capacity. Starting now. Be sincere. Surrender. Yare dekhe tare kaha krsna upadesh. It doesn’t matter who he is, (important or unimportant)What he is (grihastha or sannyasi), how he is (wealthy, poor, old, young, happy or sad), where hi is (Vrindavana or hell); “If a devotee follows the instructions of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu, he lives in the company of the Lord. Wherever he lives, he converts that place into Vrndavana and Navadwipa. This means that materialism cannot touch him. This is the secret of success fur one advancing in Krsna consciousness.” (S.P. C.C.) “


That materialism cannot touch him” means to be free from the influence of maya. Just see. As long as he faithfully follows the Lord’s instructions, under the guidance of His representative and chants the Hare-Krsna mantra teaching everyone as far as possible the same principle, he’s free; he remains in the liberated position as an associate of the Lord.


Pure Krsna consciousness can only manifest from the see-bed of humility. We must always be very careful about false pride. There is a difference between pure spiritual pride and false pride which we won’t venture to discuss for fear of increasing the volume of this book. False pride can be so subtle that what to speak of neophytes, sadhakas, and devotees who in their sadhaka deha have been elevated to the stage of svarupa siddhi, even those who have achieved vastu siddhi in the bhauma lilas of Krsna are enjoined to be very careful not to allow false pride to overtake them.



“The gopis, however, soon began to feel very proud, thinking themselves to be the most fortunate women in the universe being favored by the company of Krsna. Lord Krsna who is known as Kesava, could immediately understand their pride caused by their good fortune of enjoying Him personally, and in order to show them His causeless mercy and to curb their false pride, He immediately disappeared from the scene, exhibiting His opulence of renunciation.” “Krsna does not like His devotees to be proud of their service to Him. He accepts everyone’s service, but He does not like one devotee to be prouder than others. If sometimes there are such feelings, Krsna ends them by changing His attitude toward the devotee.” (S.P. Krsnas Book)



The preachers of the Krsna consciousness movement should never allow themselves to become proud of their association with the Lord and His various services. Even sometimes ot is seen that a devotee ironically becomes proud of his humbled position. False pride is so devilish. If we don’t want Krsna to renounce us, if we want to remain always fixed up in the company of the Lord and His devotees, through the loving service connection, then we must ever be mindful to cultivate pure devotional humility. We have to refine our thinking and our conduct. Humility doesn’t so much mean to think less of oneself as to think of oneself less. *self-aggrandizement and self-belittlement stem from an egocentric sense of self importance.


Real humility means to salute the superior qualities in others by always absorbing one’s words, mind and deeds in selfless glorification and service. Therefore, kirtania sadahari. Krsna kirtana is the ultimate expression of the humble soul. That glorification of the Lord and His devotees is exploited in various ways for one’s personal aggrandizement is most diabolical and lamentable in that it seriously undermines the very basis of genuinely progressive pure devotional experience. Such clamoring of muskrats may serve to pad one’s pockets or increase one’s bile secretion but it will never help one to taste the ambrosial mellowness of Krsna prema.


It is not at all becoming of a vaisnava to artificially think or claim himself to be a highly elevated nitya-siddha devotee of the Lord. This type of thinking should be completely avoided. Nor should we expect the godbrothers to even be slightly interested in exalting each other as such. Still, with all humility, I beg to submit that all of this and the following, practically demonstrates how Srila Prabhupada uses the word nitya siddha variously for our broader understanding.


vidhi-bhaktye nitya-siddha parisada-`dasa'

`sakha' `guru' `kanta-gana',-cari-vidha prakasa


“By executing regulative devotional service, one is elevated to the platform of an eternally perfect associate - such as a servant, friend, superior or beloved woman. These are of four varieties.” (C.C. Mad. 24.289) It is evident in the sloka that Mahaprabhu in this explanation of the atmärama verse means to say that by the application of the regulative principles of devotional service (vaidhi bhakti), one attains eternal perfection as an associate of the Lord on account of one’s sadhana siddhi. One becomes eternally perfect (nitya siddha).


Usually the word nitya-siddha is used to categorically distinguish ever-liberated jivas who have never tasted the service of maha maya from the sadhana siddhas and kripa siddhas who have come up from the status of conditional life. Here we can clearly see a variant application of the term. Just as in the case of almost any Sanskrit word, it would not be surprising to find a number of meanings. To argue over semantics is not as important as to see whether or not the siddhanta is being served. For example, some of the so called “babajis” want to denigrate our Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Sarasvati Thakur for his supposed misuse of certain words in the Gaudiya vocabulary such as for example the words nitya-baddha and nitya-mukta living entities.


They assert that according to the original Gaudiya understanding, nitha, in this context, can only mean without beginning or end in eternal time. As such a nitya baddha living entity must always categorically remain as nitya baddha; and the same for nitya-muktas. They say that nitya muktas are expansions of Krsna’s svarupa shakti who are eternally svatantra or independently free (mukta) to act on their won accord in the Lord’s service. The nitya baddhas are never free in that sense. Rather they are eternally baddha or bound to either serve under the shelter of the external energy or serve under the protection of Daivim prakriti, the internal energy. In other words the nitya baddhas are eternally subservient to the nitya muktas like Radha, lalita, Nanda-Yasoda, Subal, etc. Without being bound (baddha) to Their (the nitya mukta’s) service, the nitya baddhas can never get the power to serve the Lord.


Srila Bhaktisiddhanta Thakur Prabhupada however has wonderfully applied these terms in a totally different way. He takes the word baddha to mean material bondage and mukta to mean freedom from material bondage. That the conditioned soul, by taking shelter of daivim prakriti can change his status from nitya baddha to the status of a mukta jiva, obviously necessitates a change in the contextual implication of the term “nitya”. “Nitya” now connotes the sense of being “apparently eternal”, since time immemorial, “anadi (beginingless)” or “continuously”, as long as one willfully chooses to remain in one condition or the other. Karanam guna sangasya sad asad janma yonisu; that as long as he associates himself with the material modes through his determined attachment to vikarma, karma and jnana, he remains continuously bound (nitya baddha) to conditional existance; but as soon as he, by divine grace, surrenders himself to Krsna (mam eva ye prapadyante mayam etam taranti te), he easily gets free from the influence of mahamaya. He becomes a mukta jiva, even in this life time (jivan mukta).


He is empowered by superior agency (bhakti shakti) as long as he willfully attaches himself to the service of Krsna’s Daivim prakriti. If we tool the word “nitya” in this context to mean “without beginning or end in eternal time”, then we might conjecture that the baddha jiva could never yet free from conditional life which would not at all be in keeping with the teachings of Bhagavad Gita. We should be able to see therefore that in spite of the variant semantical applications of the terminology, the actual siddhanta basically remains intact; so why nit-pick and squable over the semantecs. This is obviously a kind of shallow-mindedness. Similarly, the word “nitya” can also take on the connotation of meaning regularly, daily, continuously (“from this day on”) or incessantly (as in nitya-seva, nitya-kriya, nitya-lila, nitya-nit-picking etc.); and the word siddha can be applied to the principle of perfection regardless of the consideration as to how, when, where or why one has achieved whatever one’s perfectional status. As long as one is situated in a perfect position, either by choice or by grace, one remains continuously perfect unless he either somehow loses grace or chooses to depart from his perfectional status by misuse of his free will. Even when one will go to the spiritual world, the marginal potentiality to misuse ones minute independence continues to exist; but because one willfully





Therefore Narottama dasa Thakura says, nitya-siddha kari mane. One should not think that because Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu was personally present five hundred years ago, only His associates were liberated. Rather Srila Narottama dasa Thakura says that anyone is a nitya-siddha if he acts on behalf of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu by spreading the glories of the holy name of the Lord. We should respect those devotees preaching the glories of the Lord as nitya-siddha and not consider them conditioned.


mam ca yo 'vyabhicarena

bhakti-yogena sevate

sa gunan samatityaitan

brahma-bhuyaya kalpate

(Bg 14.26)


One who has transcended the material modes of nature is supposed to be on the Brahman platform. That is also the platform of nitya-siddha. The nitya-siddha not only stays on the Brahman platform but also works on that platform. Simply by accepting the associates of Lord Caitanya Mahaprbhu as nitya-siddha, one can very easily go back home, back to Godhead.” (S.P. C.C. Mad. 11.89 p.p.)



“Because the temple of Lord Jagannatha is situated at Jagannatha Puri, many devotees from all parts of the world came to perform sankirtana in glorification of the Lord. All these devotees were certainly seen and heard by Maharaja Prataparudra, but he here admits that the kirtana performed by the associates of the Lord was unique. He had never before heard such sankirtan nor seen such attractive features manifest by the devotees. The members of the International Society for Krsna Consciousness should go to India during the birthday ceremony of Lord Caitanya Mahaprabhu at Mayapur and perform sankirtan congregationally. This will offer himself up to the service of the Lord under the protection of His svarupa shakti, he ever remains in his perfect constitutional position. Whether sadhana siddha, kripa siddha, nitya siddha or whatever; once siddha, always siddha (nitya-siddha).


Perhaps we should allow Srila Prabhupada to further elucidate the subject:

“Narottama dasa Thakura, honoring the personal associates of Lord Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu, has sung as follows (Prarthana 13):

gaurangera sangi-gane,

nitya-siddha kari' mane,

se yaya vrajendra-suta pasa


One who is intelligent understands that all the personal associates and devotees of Lord Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu are ever liverated. This means that they do not belong to this material world because they are always engaged in the devotioanl service of the Lord. One who is engaged in the Lord’s devotional service twenty-four hours daily and never forgets the Lord is called nitya-siddha.


Srila Rupa Goswami also confirms this statement:


iha yasya harer dasye

karmana manasa gira

nikhilasv apy avasthasu

jivan-muktah sa ucyate


“A person acting in the service of Krsna with body, mind, intelligence and words is a liberated person even within the material world, although he may be engaged in many so-called material activities.” (Bhakti-rasamrta-sindhu 1.2.187)

A devotee is always thinking of how better to serve Lord Krsna, the Supreme Personality of Godhead, and how to broadcast His name, fame and qualities throughout the world. One who is nitya-siddha has no business other than broadcasting the glories of the Lord all over the world according to his ability. Such people are already associates of Lord Caitanya Mahaprabhu.



attract the attention of all the important personalities in India, just as the beauty, bodily luster and sankirtan performance by the associate of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu attracted the attention of Maharaja Prataparudra. The associates of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu were unlimited during the Lord’s presence on the planet, but anyone who is pure in life and devoted to the mission of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu is to be understood as a nitya-siddha associate of the Lord.” (S.P., Cc. Mad. 11.96 p.p) Still further:

“Anyone who becomes exhilarated by hearing of the pastimes of Lord Krsna when He was present on this earth with His associates is to be understood as nitya-siddha, eternally perfect.” (S.P., N.O.D)



One might argue at this point that statements such as these require some qualification and honestly speaking I would tend to agree. A madhyama adhikari vaisnava is one who is very seriously endeavoring to be elevated to the perfectional stage. Having pulled up the anchor of material attachments, there is every hope and expectation that he will actually get somewhere. Where we will not see such earnestness of heart, words and actions, we could hardly see any more than a neophyte (prakrta bhakta) grounded by attachment to various anarthas. Although for purposes of encouragement we give them the benefit of the doubt that there must be some sincerity, in truth their sraddha and sense of absolute self surrender is rather paltry.


yesam tv anta-gatam papam

jananam punya-karmanam

te dvandva-moha-nirmukta

bhajante mam drdha-vratah


“Unless one is a firs-class devotee, he cannot be a preacher. A preacher is generally a topmost devotee...” (Cc. Mad 8.44 pp)


If we are actually devoted to the mission of Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu, if we are claiming to be preachers of prema dharma, then it should behoove us, to set whatever we have to aside, and, do practically whatever is required, to at least come to the stage of bhava (budha bhava samanvitah). Bhava means stai bhava or the internal realization of one’s permanent mellow of devotional ecstasy in one of the five primary rasas exchanged with the Lord.


Especially for one who has accepted the painstaking order of sannyasa, it is very necessary to be fixed-up in internally relishing the ever-fresh sweetness of realizing the eternal identity of one’s constitutional relationship with Krsna lest he chances to unfortunately become bewildered and fall victim to impure renaissances of his previous life of sense gratification on account of his ever-so-slight attachment to the gross and subtle bodily conceptions under the influence of the material modes of nature in the course of his so-called preaching. We should always remember that for a sannyasi to fall down to any sort of material sense gratification, especially sexual attraction, is a great embarrassment to the spiritual master and the whole devotional society, and should never be taken lightly. Anyone who shoots for the Rhino is glorious, but it would help to have a high caliber rifle instead of a f.f. gun. We actually need a spiritual body for expressing transcendental emotions (pure compassion); A “gold box”... at least a “gold plated box” (Brahmarpanam brahmhivir brahmagnam brahmanahutam,,, by full contribution of spiritual activities).


“At the time of initiation (mind you), a devotee gives up all his material conceptions. Therefore, being in touch with the Supreme Personality of Godhead, he is situated on the transcendental platform. Thus having attained knowledge (sambandha tattva jnana) and the spiritual platform, he always engages in the service of the spiritual body of Krsna (arca vigraha). When one is freed from material connections in this way, his body immediately becomes spiritual, and Krsna accepts his service.” (S.P. Cc. Antya 4.194 pp)


The body of a karmi is called material because the karmi, being too absorbed in material activities, is always eager to enjoy material facilities, but the body of a devotee who tries his best to work very hard for the satisfaction of Krsna by fully engaging in the Lord’s service must be accepted as transcendental.” (Bhaktisiddhanta, Cc. 4.173 pp) The example is that of an iron rod becoming red hot by contact with fire. If we want to always remain “fire up” on the spiritual platform, then we have to intelligently apply our energies (physically, mentally etc) to the suddha satvic medium of authoritatively directed pure devotional practice of bhakti yoga.


Initiation means to take sankalpa for determined application of this principle only, understanding the intentions of the pure vaisnava Guru; not for making excuses for our maintaining material attachments even after supposedly understanding, or in other words misunderstanding so many instructions son this matter. Such kind of pretentious, cheap, sentimental so-called initiation is farcical and can never bear the fruit of prema bhakti in a million years. No one is telling anyone to maintain the material bodily concept of life. No one is telling us to continue to carry our boulder, the heavy burden of material encumbrances. Throw down the boulder and you can dance and chant in ecstasy. No one is telling us that we have to remain a mudha.


But no, punah punah carvitah carvananam, chewing the chewed on the pretext of devotion, and claim to be disciples to enhance our self-esteem and false prestige in the society of devotees. We have to command respect, not demand respect; not that one big muskrat is glorified by an assembly of mice. No one is telling us not to have complete faith in the congregational chanting of the Holy name of Krsna. One who has strong faith that the holy name of Krsna is nondifferent from Krsna is considered to be a pure devotee even in the neophyte stage before undergoing the process of diksa. So what are we waiting for?! Don’t make Krsna wait. “Krsna wants His sense gratification and He demands it” (S.P) So come on! Let’s get it together!



Cheap imitative so-called devotees who are not properly engaged (“fared up”) according to the authorized processes of pure devotional service, falsely imagine that their materially absorbed (cold iron) gross and subtle bodies are spiritual bodies (sarvam khalv idam brahma) and thus pretentiously claim to be the Lord’s associates like Radha, Lalita etc incarnate, or as great saints whom they presume to be similarly materially engrossed. Due to lacking the sambandha tattva jnana which would enable them to carefully distinguish between selfish material thinking feeling, willing, and behavior and that of the selfless spiritual order, they pave the way to perpetual ruination and in truth, never rise above the corporeal platform.



Many times it is similarly seen that in order to instill “faith” in his disciples, a neophyte, prakrta bhakta shows himself to be a * elevated rupanuga vaisnava guru by either outwardly feining or even pretending to be suppressing “ecstasies” he doesn’t really have. (* that simply by taking the position of guru, his body has become as worshipable as God, he is satisfied to receive the sentimental and even rather romantic glorifications of his starry-eyed groupie fan club and, of course, the daksina (for Krsna, right?) Even he goes so far as to convince his disciples that the reason why they never see any signs of him experiencing transcendental ecstatic emotions (which he never has anyway) is because of his expertise in hiding them!


In various ways, the vested interests of various classes of cheap immitationists are served by those with insufficiently developed spiritual intelligence. No one wants a * for a guru, so it is very necessary to somehow convince the disciples that guruji is something wonderful, something special; a display of powers, opulence or fame; a display of charismatic handsomeness, esoteric knowledge or eve anything and everything in the name of yukta vairagya, or if none of these are within reach, guruji should at least make a dramatic exhibition of extreme humility.


All such phony boloney bafoonery stems from the simple fact that in reality, the genuine ecstatic transformations and transcendental opulences are naturally very prominently visible on the person of genuine highly elevated uttama adhikari spiritual masters. Even if they try to suppress them, such vikara sometimes forcefully manifest as was many times evident in the person of our own guru, Srila Prabhupada, There’s no meaning to the word imitation if there isn’t something real to be imitated. For want of genuine spiritual advancement, sometimes due to a frustrated inferiority complex, ignorance or just sheer foolishness or stupidity; less intelligent people fraudulently resort to such pathetically nefarious tactics.


Srila Bhaktivinode Thakur skillfully answers such spiritual ineptitude in this way: “If I think I am a Vaisnava, I shall look forward to receiving respect from others. And if the desire for fame and reputation pollutes my heart, certainly I shall go to hell. By giving others the remnants of my food, I shall consider myself superior and shall be burdened with the weight of false pride. Therefore, always remaining your surrendered disciple, I shall not accept worship from anyone else.” (Kalyana-kalpa-taru)


Some devotees say that the greatest austerity is in living amongst such as our fledgling society of neophytes; to stick it out through thick and through thin. I say the greatest austerity is living with myself. I’m not at all a Vaisnava. I’m a dacoit. I haven’t the humility to beg. Nor am I able to borrow as I haven’t any credit in the marketplace. I fell rather embarrassed to admit it, but truthfully speaking, although you’ll probably hate me for it, demeaning as it is, I have to confess that I’m a thief. I have to steal the nectar of the holy name as I hardly see anyone who is willing to give or even capable of sharing the thing. Hardly anyone is chanting purely.


This movement could take over the world in eighteen days if we members would relinquish our petty gross and subtle (non)sense gratificatory attachments and actually co-operate to do the needful. What is actually needed is to increase our sraddha, our faith in, taste for and attachment to the pure chanting of the holy name. We cannot spread this Krsna consciousness movement by our material calculations. Our real work is already cut out for us.


Sankirtan yajna, this congregational dancing and chanting is the life of all transcendental knowledge. It is our real wealth, our strength, and our happiness, both individually and collectively. Our society has seriously neglected this point. How can we expect to awaken a taste for something we hardly ever do. We make so many excuses why we shouldn’t have to be expected to join the sankirtan party.


“I’m a big timer now; a guru, a G.B.C., a T.P., a sannyasi, a vantasi, a father, a mother, a used car salesman; so many pressing and depressing problems to solve, solutions to find. What? Sankirtan?! Be practical! Where’s that money! People gotta eat ya know! That’s for the smalltimers, the new bhaktas, the frustrated brahmacaris, the sentimental useless good-for-nothings, the nas-beens. Anybody can do that.” Yes. That’s what I say: Anybody would do it; somebody should do it; everybody would do it; but we have no taste; so whobody is going to get the job done if nobody takes it very seriously?! Taste or no taste, there’s no substitute for Krsna consciousness.


“Sankirtan and Krsna Consciousness go well together.” (S.P.), because such performance of yajna greatly facilitates the formation of the pure, selfless, sacrificial attitude on which prema bhakti is based. There is no substitute for prema nama. “Take shelter of the holy names your only business... There is nothing but the name to be had in the fourteen worlds.” (Bhaktivinode Thakur)



If most of us were to stand alone on our own merits, we would likely be seen to be as so many zeroes. It’s the “1” of Krsna consciousness which makes us appear to be of any value. Krsna consciousness on any level is only the benignant benediction of guru and Krsna. No one should be envious of the blessings bestowed upon another Vaisnava. We should always remember that as soon as we become materially puffed-up, we immediately fall down. “This Krsna consciousness movement is meant for the parmahamsas who are completely free from all jealousy (paramam nirmatsaranam)... As soon as anyone becomes envious, he falls from the platform of paramahamsa.” (S.P. N.O.I.)


Atmendriya-priti-vancha-tare bali kama. Kama is the antithesis of prema. Prema is like fire lying dormant within the wood of our hearts. Notya-siddha krsna prema... To ignite or bring out the fire of Krsna prema, certain favorable conditions are required. We must be purposely connected with a powerful agent of prema bhakti shakti, the “fire-up”, potent spiritual master, and the qualified disciple must be intelligent enough to keep the wood of his heart dry or free from lusty preoccupations. Not that we pour the water of material sense gratification on the wood and expect to get “fire-up” or any such folly.



So anyway Prabhus, lets cut the cop. You ain’t no good and I ain’t no good. But if we chant Hare Krsna together and give up our false egoistical dealings with each other, we might get better in spite of ourselves. It’s not that we should be preaching “I’m O.K.; you’re O.K.; you’re not O.K.” I would rather suggest that it would be the safer position for a sadhaka to preach, “I may not be very O.K. and you may not be very O.K., but we can hope to get better if we will follow in the footsteps of the mahajanas who are O.K.”


I don’t know anyone amongst us who couldn’t stand to improve his quality of Krsna consciousness.

Srila Prabhupada has said, “Human life is meant for thoughtfulness. I beg all of you to please keep it on the platform of simple living and high thinking. How dare anyone suggest to others that someone is a sahajiya when he hasn’t even bothered to get to know the person. I think “anyone” owes “ someone” an apology for all this nonsense, if “anyone” thinks he’s man enough to look “ someone” square in the eyes.


To hell with gopi-bhava; let’s first try to be as grown men. At any rate you should at least give me credit for having a good sense of humor. I don’t hold grudges. To err is human; to forgive, divine. A sahajiya is a spiritual moron who, by unreasonable comparison, deviously superimposes his perversely mundane, lusty conceptions based on carnal sensations as well as worldly sentiments and their attendant values pertaining to the partiva rasa and svargiya rasa known to this material sphere, upon the descriptions of the transcendental Vaikuntha rasa or adi-rasa exchanged between the supramundane entities of the spiritual realm.


Atah sri Krsna namadi na bhaved grayam indriyaih. Mistaking gold to be like iron, he or she cheaply considers that which is spiritually experienceable only through purified senses (gold) to be equivalent to the iron of his preconceived abominable sensual and mental aberrations, and indulges in artificially induced, misleading, imitative expressions of pseudo-spiritualistic fantasies primarily aimed at exploiting the opposite sex or even otherwise for gross or subtle selfish sense gratifications in the name of spiritual advancement. To serve his nefarious purposes, he ostentatiously displays a towering edifice of “advanced” devotion beyond his actual degree of knowledge and faith.



With all dye respect, I dare to inform you that neither privately (even in dreams) nor publicly do I ever reveal in such ignoble child-like antics. The question should not be “Is Aindra a sahajiya?” The real question is “Are you a nitya-siddha associate of the Lord; and if not - why not?!”


It was asked “...what view of himself he (Aindra Dasa) currently holds.” My answer is that I see myself as spiritually impoverished, downtrodden and unnoticed by my beloved spiritual master and Krsna. I couldn’t do anything nice or noteworthy to assist Them in preaching this great prema-nama-sankirtan movement in the world.


This may very likely be my last birth in the material world. My battered heart anguishes at the improbability of a miniscule microbe like me ever making a seriously substantial contribution in such a short life span. How big could I get anyway? At least I should not go away like the others; and carry on with my “shnick-shnick, ram-ram’s”. I certainly don’t see myself as belonging to any of the varnas, asramas, or any other mundane, extrinsically designated state of affairs. I’m not even one little bit this body, you know.


Fortunately, by the grace of Srila Prabhupada’s tenderheartedness, in my better moments, when I’m allowed to try to just be myself without having to live up to everybody else’s expectations, I do rather prefer to see myself as a very poor insignificant servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the servant of the holy name of Krsna, the honeymoon faced Master of the Vraja gopis; a sold-out animal, useless as I may be.



I’m meaner than the means of the mean, lower than the lowest of the low, and worser than the worsest of the worst. If you see me, you should immediately run and jump in the Yamuna with all your clothes on. If you hear me yodeling (trying to sing), you should grimace, loudly stomp your feet on the ground and with your brahmin threads wrapped three times around your thumbs, pointing your forefingers in the sky, repeatedly curse the creator for making you with ear holes that don’t automatically close. If you unfortunately say my name, wash your mouth out with Dettol soap. My heart is as hard and black as coal. Cleaning coal is hopeless. My only hope is that by the intense heat from the fire of ordeal combined with the intense pressure of the association of my watchdog-like-godbrothers, it may soon be transformed into a diamond which at least can be made to look a little good. The problem is that it’s still not so good to have a heart as hard as a diamond. Even still, there is this Hare Krsna mantra chanting.” It is so nice that even the most stonehearted man will be melted. Pasana means ‘stone’. It is so nice that even stone will melt.” (from Dhamali by Locan dasa, S.P. pp)



hari hari! bifale janama gonainu

manusya-janama paiya, radha krsna na bhajiya,

janiya suniya bisa khainu

goloker prema-dhana hari-nama sankirtana,

rati na janmilo kene tay


“O Lord Hari, Lord Hari! I’ve spent my life uselessly. Having obtained this rare human birth and having neglected to worship Radha and Krsna, I have knowingly drunk poison.

The treasure of divine love in Goloka Vrindavan has descended as the congregational chanting of Lord Hari’s holy names. Why did my attraction for that chanting never come about?” (from Prarthana, Narottama dasa)


“Krsna is easily visible, but He is only visible to those who are devoted to Him. For those who are envious, foolish or unintelligent He obscures Himself with His veil of maya:

naham prakasah sarvasya


mudho ’yam nabhijaanati

loko mam ajam avyayam

‘I am never manifest to the foolish and unintelligent. For them I am covered by My eternal creative potency (maya); thus the deluded world knows Me not, who am unborn and infallible.’ (Bg 7.25)



This eternal creative potency, or yoga-maya, which obscures Krsna to the unintelligent, is dissolved by love. This is the verdict of Brahma-samhita:


santah sadaiva hrdayesu vilokayanti

‘One who has developed love for Krsna can see Him within his heart twenty-four hours a day.’



Those who thus see Krsna are not anxious because they know where they are going at death. One who has taken the gift of Krsna consciousness knows that he will not have to return to this material world to tale another material body but that he will go to Krsna. It is not possible to go to Krsna unless one attains a body like Krsna’s, a sac-cid-ananda-vigraga body, a body full of eternity, knowledge and bliss. One cannot enter into fire and not perish unless he himself becomes fire, and similarly one cannot enter into the spiritual realm in a body that is not spiritual. In a spiritual body one can dance with Krsna in the rasa dance like the gopis and the cowherd boys. This is not an ordinary dance, but the dance of eternity, in the association of the Supreme Personality of Godhead. Only those who have become purified in their love for Krsna can participate in it.


Therefore one should not take this process of Krsna consciousness as something cheap, but as a matchless gift bestowed upon suffering humanity by the Lord Himself. Simply by engaging in this process, all the anxieties and fears of one’s life, which in actuality revolve about the fear of death, are allayed.” (S.P., “Matchless Gifts”) Here Srila Prabhupada typically entreats us, enchants us, challenges us to go back home, back to Godhead. Krsna consciousness movement.


“Movement” means not only to “move” all over the world to effect the progressive horizontal expansion of this “movement” in the physiological sense, but also and especially to individually and collectively (as far as possible) “move” towards the ultimate aim of this Krsna consciousness “movement”, “to approach Radha-Krsna and associate with the Supreme Lord in His sublime pleasure dance.” (Manah-siksa, S.P. pp)


I know I’m not qualified! If I tried to enter the rasa dance in my present condition with my pot belly, sparking red whiskers, burning cinder-like eyes and smoking ears, I would probably scare everybody away. But I’ll never give up the hope of one day ultimately achieving that cherished goal of my life for the pleasure of my guru by his grace, even if it takes me millions of lifetimes. I challenge any of you to in any way even dare to refute, minimize, or dismiss my inimitable philosophical vantage point.


Children shouldn’t play with matches; honest grown-ups will impartially recognize, appreciate, commend, bless and even embrace such transcendental ideological persuasion not fearing me any grudge. Thus I stand my ground. I’m not a cynic. I have great hope for the Hare Krsna Movement. I’m convinced that there are a few good men. Not everyone is a hypocrite. However, our Bhaktivinode Thakur warns that insincerity lurks as a highway robber just around the bend in the road to rob us of our sincerity, so we should be careful about hypocrisy.


“My path is difficult. I am blind and my feet are slipping again and again. Therefore, may the saints help me by granting me the stick of their mercy as my support.” (Cc Antya 1.2)



I hope I have given you a small glimpse into my philosophical outlooks and inlooks, for what its worth. If anyone had trouble understanding what I meant to say, please read it again or otherwise feel free to further discuss the philosophy with me in person next time you come to Srila Prabhupada’s home (and my home also), the beautiful land of Vraja.

If I have hurt anyone’s feelings by my frank and verbose outpourings or if I have been impertinent, impudent, or inconsiderate in any way, please benevolently view it as a gleam of my intrinsic contrary nature and either forgive me or punish me according to your whims.


Hoping this finds you blissfully pursuing your eternal relationship with Krsna.


Your reprehensible bum of a dirty low born scumbag,

insignificant Aindra das Krpanacarya Svapnanandi Peapod


P.S. Really guy’s, I’m not just joshin’ ya this time. It’s real!

P.P.S. Please don’t forget the cashew burfi, if anyone still “loves” me after all this (bhunkte bhojayate caiva)

P.P.P.S. At lest be glad I didn’t say I was an eternal associate of Candravali!!!

P.P.P.P.S. Krsna is beautiful... isn’t He?

P.P.P.P.P.S.With your kind permission, I want to turn my attention back to my Kirtan service now. Hari nama eva kevalam. Om Tat Sat.

Braja-sundari Dasi - August 9, 2010 1:26 am

I apologize for the grafic form of the text. Due to some touchpad problem I have big difficulty to make any changes because text keeps coming back to the beginning. But I will try to do it slowly, few paragraphes at time

Madan Gopal Das - August 9, 2010 1:53 am

Aindra was a hilarious rabble-rouser! Just a note that this was written (I think by hand!) around 1997. Certainly not the only time he had run-ins with management or when he had A LOT to say in return. I don't know how he ever got a book written, it must be like a billion pages! Now that must have taken one dedicated editor!

Braja-sundari Dasi - August 12, 2010 11:39 pm
For example, in Vrndavan, we don’t offer bhoga to the deities according to the pancaratriki system to make for a karma-free diet. Everything cooked in Vrndavan is already prasadam; we don’t offer to the deity to make it prasadam as we do in the other temples in other parts of the world. To try to impose the understanding applicable in other temples to the deity worship here would be sheer misunderstanding, a veritable violation of Vraja law so to speak.


I was wondering about this statement... Certainly I have seen some devotees doing offering to make the food pure but mostly it happened when devotees were buying food from the store. It wasn`t dominating mentality in Iskcon temples that I lived in or visited. And it surprises me to hear that this is what pancaratrika system means. I was trained in pujari seva by elder devotees, I attended several meetings for pujaris and I have read Iskcon "Pancaratra Pradipa" many times. My understanding was that we cook only for the pleasure of Krishna and that even if pujari forgets to offer some preparation, still it can be considered offered if it was intention of the cook. I don`t remember hearing that there is a difference between temples in Vraja Bhumi in India and any of its expansions in form of different temples all over the world.

Is there any sastric statement in this regard?

Madan Gopal Das - August 13, 2010 1:33 pm

To be honest, I didn't read the whole thing. My guess is that Aindra is just kind of highlighting a higher understanding of the dhama, and as much as he embraced that understanding advocating for it. I'm sure that the pujaris there follow the standard pancaratra system like any other iskcon temple, but the individual pujari may have some feeling beyond the system. Also, I think in his fanatical/bhava feelings for living in the dhama (he very rarely left, only if forced for some reason) he is distinguishing the dhama from other places in the world. Of course we know that any place can be Vraja with the right consciousness, and that Vraja-bhumi can appear covered by wrong consciousness, but Aindra is identifying with the dhama and thinking of other places as the battleground with maya, rather than other temples being "embassies" of Vraja.

Words like this are all about context, most importantly the context of the speakers mood - is he preaching or "feeling"? Also, this is a letter to leaders who I would guess he is trying to elevate, rather than offer some practical managerial instructions. I would suspect management was not his forte'.

Lastly, I think his use of the phrase "karma-free diet" is sarcastic and goofy. Probably another critique of the preaching mission.

These are just my ideas...