Tattva-viveka
The idea of "Home"
Jason - November 22, 2006 3:26 am
As I’ve mentioned in the past, I’m a huge fan of the magazine Parabola. The most recent issue explores the idea of “home” from various religious traditions. I’m always really amazed by the essays and I almost always walk away from my reading feeling really good; food for thought, that keeps me thinking throughout the day. I often find the different perspectives beneficial for my own spiritual practice and often find parallels within the Vaisnava tradition. It a magazine that I’d love to see Swami featured in someday.
I know that Robert wanted this forum to examine religious topics from other vantage points, so I hope this will get the ball rolling. Please excuse the length, but what started as a brief post, ended up spending the day with me at school and turned into an essay that will be further “tweaked” and probably used for a future assignment. Nevertheless, I think it’s relevant here.
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I was reading an issue of Parabola Magazine, one that examines the idea of “home” from several religious perspectives and started to think about what the word [home] meant to me. One contributing writer suggested that all animals have homes; caves, burrows, dens, etc., but also pointed out that it’s an oversimplification to merely equate house with home because home, in an absolute sense, goes beyond the physical dwelling of any individual.
I began thinking about how I feel when I go “home” to visit my folks. I don’t really feel attached or sentimental to their geographical location because we moved so much when I was younger (I was a military kid) and never really grew roots, though I do consider Richmond, Virginia my hometown. However, when I’m at my parent’s place (currently in Louisiana), I feel some comfort because of how they have adjusted their immediate surroundings – the decorations, pictures, layout, smells, etc. This seemed to create the home that I am familiar with. But what is trying to be created? When I leave work and go to my apartment in Berkeley, what is it that I walk into that makes it home? Is my apartment an accurate representation of what I feel my home should be? One author pointed out that, “…almost universally, the home is vivified by a spirit of some sort.” When I was young, life centered around my grandparents house. They had lived there; it seemed, since the beginning of time. My family as well as the families of my aunts and uncles were always there. We were eating, visiting, working, talking and playing. It didn’t matter if it was the third Tuesday of the month or some special occasion; there was always some reason to be at their house. It seemed to be the hub of our lives. At some point that changed. We all inevitably moved to different locations, my grandparents died and it almost seemed like my mother, no matter where we moved to, was constantly trying to recreate that sense of home. To this day she feels guilty; like we [my sister and I] lacked an appreciation of home because we were uprooted so much. She always comments on why I move so much; Richmond, Cleveland, San Francisco, back to Richmond, D.C., Chicago, back to San Francisco and now Berkeley, and why I don’t desire to be closer to family.
After visiting Audarya a few times and seeing the devotees, Maharaja and the development of the temple, and after getting an idea of the history of the community that visits Audarya, I find myself re-evaluating my idea of “home”. Even my wife agrees, “It just feels different there.” Why? My guess is that it represents the highest ideal; the eternal spiritual home that many persons never have the good fortune to experience here on earth. Forgive me for not having the ability to quote sastra or other sources with which devotees may be more familiar, but as a thread in the “interfaith” forum, I hope this works just as well.
Another essay in the issue on “home” was from the Jewish perspective, a mystical rendering of a story from the Torah, which brought to light the Hebrew idea of devah b’tachtonim, or, “a dwelling place in the lowest realm”. As the story goes, an angel was asked by God to go to earth and bring back the most valuable thing in all of creation. After a few attempts, each not quite right, the angel finally gives God the tears of a man who, having made many wrong choices, was crying and yearning for the closeness of God. This was the most treasured thing for which God had sought. One key point of the story is that Heaven directs the angel to earth to look for that most valuable thing in all of the cosmic manifestation?! Might we have something that Heaven is looking for? What about the whole premise for Mahaprabhu’s descent? The author suggests, and I know it is echoed by Vaisnava acharyas, that while “our urge is to journey to higher planes, God’s desire is to be here with us.”
The essay goes on to explain that we should create a place for God here. A Vaisnava rendering of the Torah’s narrative brings to my mind things like, serving in separation, rules and regulations as a means to ready ourselves for what lies beyond those rules, surcharging the physical realm by “Krsna-izing” our surroundings, “dovetailing” and acting in such a way that God sees you, not so that you can see God. We have to somehow make a home for God in a seemingly godless world.
Swami’s first ever email to me said something in this regard. He said that by understanding these things and acting in such a way that we accommodate God through bhakti, “…we will be on our way to building a temple [home] of Gaura prema in our hearts.” So, when I look at Audarya, I can see that under Maharaja’s guidance and personal realizations, many are working to build an external manifestation of a home that they are, via devotional service, uncovering in their own hearts during the process. Some of the rituals like arcana and installing the Ananta Sesa Deity under the new temple foundation demonstrates that everything done there rests on their desire to accommodate Lord Gauranga, who, like the name Maharaja chose for his monastery suggests, is the most magnanimous appearance of the Supreme. He came to live in our world and subsequently in our hearts, in search of something that He treasured.
Another essay briefly talks about the grhastha ashram that we’re familiar with. I think it is interesting that swami doesn’t push the brahmacari/sannyasi lifestyle as the only way to live our lives. The majority of us on the forum are householders. Maharaja recognizes each of us individually, knows our desires, tendencies, strengths and weaknesses, but encourages us accordingly. He suggests, as the saying goes, to make our houses homes by serving the Deity and Tulasi devi and creating an environment suitable for bhakti to grow. He wouldn’t ask us to do something that he isn’t doing himself. He and the monks at Audarya seek the same goal. Maintaining our vows and a sense of balance as householders in the midst of all the stress and obstacles, can be at least, “occasionally [spiritually] transforming”, as one essayist put it.
I was thinking about how I feel when I visit Audarya and how I know that I’m benefiting by just being there. In Huston Smith’s essay, The Long Way Home, he also talked about the feeling of “homecoming” and how it is a benediction, but not just for those who arrive; in this case, those who visit Audarya, but to those homebodies/audaryavasis who await their arrival. I found this really sweet because Maharaja has always encouraged us to return and is happy when he knows we’re coming. The monks at Audarya, as the Motel 6 commercial states, “always leave the light on for you”, and are eager for our return.
So, in closing, Martin Buber said in The Way of Man: According to the teachings of Hasidism, “There is something that can only be found in one place. It is a great treasure, which may be called the fulfillment of all existence. The place this treasure can be found is the place on which one stands.” Today I am at home. Have I created a place for that treasure to manifest here? In a few days I will be at Audarya, where I know that treasure already resides.
thanks for listening....
Tadiya Dasi - December 5, 2006 4:44 pm
Jason,
Thanks for sharing your thoughts and bringing up this fascinating idea of "home" in all the religions. This magazine you mentioned, Parabola, sounds very interesting. I don't have much time right now, but I just wanted to write and let you know that I read this and that it's very thought-provoking...I will come back to this thread later and share my thoughts on it....when I have more time 
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You wrote:
In Huston Smith’s essay, The Long Way Home, he also talked about the feeling of “homecoming” and how it is a benediction, but not just for those who arrive; in this case, those who visit Audarya, but to those homebodies/audaryavasis who await their arrival. I found this really sweet because Maharaja has always encouraged us to return and is happy when he knows we’re coming. The monks at Audarya, as the Motel 6 commercial states, “always leave the light on for you”, and are eager for our return.
I have never been to Audarya, but I can still relate to this sentiment. It's my experience from the retreats here at Finland that when Guru Maharaj arrives he brings with him the "feeling of home" for everyone. And think of the inhabitants of Vraja and even Krishna himself - how imporant is their homes, and home-village and surroundings to them! Being with Krishna won't feel the same for Radha if it's outside of Vrindavan, outside of "home", in the big city like Dwaraka etc. Home is where one can relax and just be. Like Gurudev so often says: Krishna in Vrindavan is God being himself. God being at home